Megan's prayer: MercyMe's "I know"

I have a friend who doesn't have a religious bone in her. We talk about everything under the sun, but our conversations about my faith and beliefs always seem somewhat pointless. While I can respect her for who she is, sometimes it's hard because I wish she was able to see God's love for her.

I know that when I go through hard times, what helps me is knowing that God is always there, and will always love me, even if I feel like no one else does at that time. I just wish that she could see the same thing.

No matter what it is you're going through
Even if you think you're far beyond where hope can see
I know there is a hand that's reaching out for you
Because He did the same for me

Megan's prayer: Third Day's "You are Mine"

I think
Of all that I have done wrong
And everything that you have done
To make it right.

During high school, I held the highly acclaimed position of "cleaning girl" at the daycare I worked at after school. I wasn't old enough to legally be responsible for the kids, so I was put in charge of cleaning all the dishes from lunch and snack, sweeping, mopping, vacuuming, and cleaning the bathrooms. It was definitely not a job I looked forward to. While all of the little kids, and the other girls who were old enough to be legally responsible hung outside and played games and ate Popsicles, I was inside cleaning toilets. And not just the toilets, but the floors and the walls as well, because little kids don't have very good aim.

At the beginning of each day I would ask myself "Why am I here? Isn't there a more enjoyable job I could do?" but by the end, after I had finished cleaning and got to spend 30 minutes outside with the little kids, coloring with chalk and playing hide-and-go seek, it made the day worthwhile. Suddenly I didn't mind cleaning up after their messes they left for me everyday.

I think this helps me grasp just how much I'm loved by God. Even when I make mistakes, or make a mess of my life, or leave things completely out of order, God comes behind me and makes it all better. He may not be thrilled while he is doing this, but his love for me is always there. Especially in the end, when he's finished helping me straighten out my life, and we just get to hangout.

Chris' prayer: Third Day's "You are Mine"

It doesn’t take much for my heart to break
And you have done it for what’s seems the millionth time

I didn't make it far in this song. I got stuck wondering how the Lord could break my heart a million times. If anything, it would be me who is breaking His heart, for it is I who am letting Him down. It is I who sin. But then I thought about the couple of times in the Bible where it mentioned the people being "hard of heart." Whenever this is mentioned, it means stubbornness. I can definitely be stubborn. And it is in those times of stubbornness that I sin.

So when Mac Powell sings of having his heart broken for the millionth time, I *think* He is talking about Jesus softening his hardness of heart, breaking through the exterior shell in that way, forgiving him of his sin. If that is the case, then I need my heart broken. I need His presence in my life. I need His Love to cover all of my transgressions.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Katie's prayer: Third Day's "You are Mine"

I got so excited when I saw the title of today's song. "You are Mine." I thought, "thank you God, this is exactly what I need right now, a song from your point of view telling me how much you love me, and I'm still yours no matter what!" But then I listened to the song and found it was not a song from God's point of view, it was from man's point of view. The singer (which I guess is me now, cause I've started singing along) is saying to God "You are Mine." And while it's not what I originally thought the song was about, nor what I thought I needed to hear today, God knew better about what I needed to hear.

Too often I find myself not claiming God. Too often I find myself acting more like Saint Peter than like Saint John, denying Christ instead of embracing him. It's ok for me to wear my cross necklace today because I'll be at the diocese, and they know of my faith, it's ok to flaunt it. No, I don't think I'll wear it today because I'll be at school. I'm around my apathetic faith friends, I shouldn't wear my rosary bracelet. And even more recently, when people at school ask me my plans after graduation, instead of telling them "I feel called to be a youth minister," I reply "I don't know, hopefully get a job somewhere."

So while the message of God loves me is a great message, today's message is: I love God and I should stop being so picky about who I share that with. It's time for me to claim God as mine!

It's by your sacrifice
I can say that
I am yours and you are mine

Catie's prayer: Third Day's "You are Mine"

Sometimes I wonder why
you even love me
And why you ever chose
to call me child

This is where I'm at right now. I keep questioning why God loves me as much as he does. And he keeps telling me to just stop questioning it and sometimes I do, but other times I don't. I wonder why he would want to love someone as human as me. However, God is God and that's what he does. He loves. Unconditionally. No strings attached. Just the way we are. And that, is simply beautiful.

Jen's prayer: Third Day's "You are mine"

It doesn't take much
For me to shed a tear
And you have done so many things
To make me cry
Whenever I think
Of all that I've done wrong
And everything that you have done
To make it right

Every day this week I feel like I've done something stupid, but every night God is still there for me and I just don't deserve it. And while I don't normally cry when I pray, it's times "whenever I think of all that I've done wrong and everything that you have done to make it right" that makes me tear up a bit and praise Him even more.

Jen's prayer: Steven Curtis Chapman's "God is God"

God and I have been fighting a lot. My flesh wants to go one way and God's spirit is leading me to go the exact opposite direction. Needless to say, it's a lot of weepy prayers of me going, "Why God. Whyyyyyy."

*sigh*

A problem with young peoples like myself is we refuse to look to the future very often. I see what I want now and I know how I'm feeling and I think I know exactly what is best. Yet somehow when I talk to my older and wiser parents they have an entirely different idea because they're looking "down the road of my future." I want to brush off their advice, but even Steven Curtis Chapman is bringing up the obvious...

I can only see a part of the picture He’s painting

Although I realize what I need to do (God's told me and my parents have emphasized it), it still sucks. I can't see this picture God's painting, but if I just trust Him, it'll be so much prettier than what I currently have in mind.

Catie's prayer: Steven Curtis Chapman's "God is God"

God is God and I am not
I can only see a part of the picture He’s painting
God is God and I am man
So I’ll never understand it all
For only God is God

There are so many times when I want to see the entire picture. I want to see where I'm going, what I should plan for, what I need to expect. However, that's not how God works. God works on his own time, in his own way. While I would like to be able to see the big picture now, it is probably for the better that I can't. For now, I'll try to be patient and let God tell me in his own time. It'll be better that way anyway.

Chris' prayer: Steven Curtis Chapman's "God is God"

I can only see a part of the picture He’s painting

When I heard this line, the first thing that came to mind was a video I saw awhile ago of a painter on stage in front of a large audience. As he painted, music played, and the painter would spin the canvas and paint various parts of the artwork, seemingly at random. Through much of the video, which was about 5 minutes long, the painting didn't look like much of anything. The randomness of the artist's strokes, coupled with not knowing which direction was up, made it very hard to decipher what he was trying to achieve. Suddenly though, right before the end, the artist spun the painting to its correct orientation, and the beauty of the painting was revealed to all.

According to Steven, and according to my experience, this is how God often works as well. He is working in all different areas of my life, setting up things that are seemingly unrelated, and then in an instant they all come together and produce a masterpiece. Though I may not be able to see the entire painting, I have to trust that the other parts are being worked on, and that it will all come together in the end.

Lord, please paint my world with your brush of Life.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Katie's prayer: Steven Curtis Chapman's "God is God"

I am not God. That statement may sound like a no-brainer, but sometimes, it's not so easy to realize. I get into this habit of planning out my entire life, telling God how my life is going to go, what's best for me, all that. I take what should be God's role in my life and make it my role.

When I do take the time to see what God has in store for me, I don't always look fully. I can only see a part of the picture He’s painting. I may look at some part, think I see a dog and just run with it. Ok God, you want this to be a dog, I got it! That's great, cause it's exactly what I wanted for my life too! After a while, though, I'll look back at that part and suddenly, the dog looks like a chicken. But it can't be a chicken, it has to be a dog, because that's what God was calling me towards a month ago, and that's what I want for my life! So I move on with this delusion that I think I know what God wants for me, but really it's not.

I'm at a point in my life right now where I think what I saw as a dog is now becoming a chicken. That scares me, and I don't like it. I desperately want it to be a dog. But like I said at the beginning of this post, I'm not God.

God is God and I am not
I can only see a part of the picture He’s painting
God is God and I am man
So I’ll never understand it all
For only God is God

pssst... I hope my dog-chicken thing didn't confuse you, they were metaphors, really. I don't really see a dog or a chicken in my immediate future. (:

Megan's prayer: Steven Curtis Chapman's "God is God"

God is God and I am not
I can only see a part of the picture He’s painting

I was talking with a friend a few months ago who had just got into a new relationship. She told me that it made her a bit nervous when she realized just how much she liked the guy, and that she was almost scared that it happened to quickly. She said instead of allowing herself to become worried and stress about it, she just gave it up to God. She told me that she prayed to God and trusted in Him, knowing that he would help lead her down the right path, whether it be with this guy or not.

So often I fail to see, or even think about, the big picture. I focus on myself and think of how I should plan my life, but after talking with my friend, I (once again) realized just how important it is to trust in God, knowing that only he can see the complete picture.

Megan's prayer: Kara's "Sunshine"

You are the silver line
Making all things beautiful

If I look hard enough, I can normally find the good in a situation. The problem is, it's so easy to settle on the bad, and not look any further.

Why does it happen this way? Wouldn't the world be a much happier place if people focused on the good instead?

Chris' prayer: Kara's "Sunshine"

God is everywhere. And, as often as I've heard that, and as well as I know that, sometimes I forget it. I tend to pigeonhole God; I expect to find him only in church on Sunday, or during our youth ministry program Sunday night, in a Christian book I'm reading. I'm certain that I miss His presence fairly regularly because I'm not expecting Him to be outside of this neat little box that I've made for Him.

For instance, awhile ago for my church's website, I wrote a blog about my surprise in discovering a new Kirk Franklin song on, of all places, the local rap/hip-hop station. I was just flipping through the stations, trying to find something for the last couple of minutes of my car ride, almost ready to give up and listen to commercials or the new Hanson song, or whatever happened to be playing, when I heard this awesome beat coming from the hip-hop station. I was shocked to find out, a handful of seconds later, when the voice was singing about Jesus. It was just not expected at all.

I felt similarly tonight, when hearing Sunshine for the first time. God can be in....techno music?!


Lyrics

Jen's prayer: Kara's "Sunshine"

even when its raining inside
You fill my heart with sunshine

This song...though I suppose could be taken to be kind of cheesy...was perfect for today! It actually was raining outside and I have been learning this week the importance of receiving joy from God and solely him. Jesus fills my heart with sunshine even on the rainy days. I just have to learn how to receive that sunshine instead of focusing on the rain.

Katie's prayer: Kara's "Sunshine"

You are the silver line
making all things beautiful

Last year, I was sitting in adoration and noticed a book that was just calling out to me to be read. He's a little excerpt of the page I turned to...

"In today's Eucharistic Scriptures, the Lord throws our repented sins far into the ocean, into the very depths of the sea (Mi 7:19). Then He puts up a huge sign marked: "No Swimming!" Yet some of us don't really understand God's amazing love. We put on a spiritual wetsuit, dive into the ocean to retrieve our guilt, and spend years feeling guilty for having caused God and others so many problems. We're more comfortable in our prison of guilt than in being set free by Jesus.

The Lord doesn't want us to move back into prison after He's set us free. He grabs the guilt we recovered from the sea and tramples it under His feet (Mi 7:19). Jesus is serious. He really doesn't want us to take back that guilt. At this point, some of us are tempted to feel guilty about feeling guilty. This is why Jesus tells the story about the prodigal son. Jesus wants to see the guilty party — with music and celebration (Lk 15:23, 25)."

Once during confession, a priest informed me that God would somehow use my sin to help others. Make no mistake, God does not will us to sin, but when we do, God uses that to change our lives and others for the better. (that's the silver lining) Sometimes I have trouble seeing that silver lining. I feel guilty about my sin, diving down into that ocean over and over again, instead of turning to God and finding the silver lining.

Catie's prayer: David Crowder Band's "Come Awake"

Shine, shine, Oh shine
We will shine

I think many times in my life I have been afraid to shine. Afraid to shine because I don't want the spotlight, afraid that I will be in the spotlight and mess up, whatever. However God doesn't want us to hide our light, he wants us to show it to the world. He wants us to make him, make his love known to all those whom we encounter. If we hide our light we can't do that. There's this quote that I absolutely love, that I might have used on here before. But if I did it's good enough to be said again.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same."

Megan's prayer: David Crowder Band's "Come Awake"

You are not the only one

While I feel like this song uses this line in a reassuring way, in a way that says, "Don't worry - others feel the way you do - you are not alone," I took it out of context, and in a completely different way.

You are not the only one

Sitting through 8-10 classes a week with the same 25 girls can get exhausting. What amazes me is the amount of complaining done by certain girls, when, in reality, we all have the EXACT same amount of work to do.

You are not the only one

Sometimes I just want to scream this at people. Why can't they see that we are all in the same boat? Why do they continue to complain when no one is going to sympathize with them because, guess what, we all have the same amount of homework?

And while this bothers me, I know that I am occasionally one of the girls asking "why am I the only one?" I get sucked into the pity party, looking for someone to sympathize with me.

Lord, I ask you to keep me focused these last 9 days of papers and projects. Help me to be confident in my abilities, and not to crumble under this pressure and think that I am the only one going through this.

Chris' prayer: David Crowder Band's "Come Awake"

I love David Crowder Band. Their music just has a way that speaks to me, no matter where I am on my spiritual journey. There is always a DCB song that I can relate to. This one is no exception. The thing that I love about this song is something I love about a few other DCB songs, and that is the way the song crescendos from a soft, quiet, relaxing melody to a note or a line that just grabs the listener and proclaims loudly the line.

In this song, we are told to be quiet and wait. Wait for that one voice which will say to us, "Rise." Once we hear that voice, through the crescendo of the song, we can see exactly what we will experience if we heed that call. Life will not be lived quietly or reservedly once we have heard his voice. Life will be experienced completely, totally, fulfillingly. And we will...

Shine

YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Katie's prayer: David Crowder Band's "Come Awake"

Eleven days. (Technically 10 days, 18 hours, 35 minutes and 45 seconds) That is how long I have until graduation. And I am scared out of my mind! Last week I somehow had peace about the whole not knowing what's going to happen twelve days from now. For some reason, that peace left me this week, and thus left me scared out of my mind! I'm so afraid of what the future holds. Am I going to get a job? Where? Will I have to go apartment searching? Am I going to go back and live with my parents? So much to fear.
So often I feel alone in that fear. Being the dramatic person I am, I start thinking that I'm the only one that has no idea what's going to happen. ALL my friends have known what they wanted to do with their lives since birth, and I just figured out my vocation a month ago. ALL my friends have a million different jobs they could apply for and be happy, I have very few. ALL my friends have their entire lives figured out, and I know a little about even the next eleven days. But really, thoughts like that are stupid! They have got to be just as scared as me. None of them have been hired anywhere. They don't know where they'll be either. So then, I must not be alone in my fear.
But, I don't know for sure, because we don't talk much about the future around here. Sure, we're totally counting down to graduation (and have been since August) but past that, we don't talk.

You are not the only one
Who feels like the only one.

Maybe if we started talking, my stress level would go down, because I might just realize that I"m not the only one. And who knows, it might help their stress level too.

Catie's prayer: Kara's "Sunshine"

Forgive me, Lord, for I have sinned
and I've been places
I should never have been
and I'm tired of feeling guilty
all the timelost in a whirlwind
a thunderstorm raging deep within
and only You can save me
Lord, come and save me

This is the story of my life right now. I'm feeling guilty for a lot of things I have done in my past, and now I am forced to make decisions as to try and mend the wrongs I've done. But I'm scared. I'm scared of what the other person will think of me, I'm afraid of what might happen, I'm just scared. However, I know and have to remember that God is taking care of me. Even through the storms, even when I've done wrong, he still loves me. Today during mass the priest started talking about how much God loves us and my eyes welled up with tears. It never seizes to amaze me how much God loves me, how much he can look past all that I've done wrong and still love me. That great love surrounds each of us constantly. There is not a moment that goes by that we are not loved.

Jen's prayer: David Crowder Band's "Come Awake"

I love this song. It seems like years ago that my friend Tasha and I would carpool to college together and play this first thing in the morning for the obvious reason: Come awake. We were so tired and grouchy in the morning and this song always got us going on a more positive note. Good times. :)

Today, this song has helped me in a different way. There's a lot going on inside my mind right now and I feel like God and I are playing some major tug-of-war. I feel really confused. Ironically, I had this David Crowder album in my car's CD player already and I don't think that was a coincidence. After finding out this was today's song and then getting in my car and hearing it, I was pumped. It was good to hear these lyrics:

You are not the only one
Who feels like the only one
Night soon will be lifted friend
Just be quiet and wait for the voice

I cut out the last three words of that final line because the words above are the ones that I really need.
I'm not alone. My frustrations are things many have experienced. This "night" or heaviness on my heart will soon be lifted if I just quietly wait to hear God's voice on the matter.

Chris' prayer: Steven Curtis Chapman's "Only Natural"

Advertisements. Newspaper and magazine articles. Television shows. Music. We are constantly bombarded with messages that tell us both what "natural" is and how we should do "what comes naturally." It is natural, for instance, for men to sow their seed, to desire physical intimacy as a primary need. It is natural, we are told, to protect our own interests, to look out for ourselves. It is natural to seek justice for those who have wronged us, and also somehow natural to seek to avoid justice when we have wronged others. It's only natural.

But, as Chapman explains, we are not called to be natural. We are called by God to be supernatural. We are called to rise above our natural instincts. Indeed, what other creatures are able to move past instinctual urges, to supersede them?

One way that we are able to reach past natural instinct is by forgiving others. Taken logically, it doesn't make any sense to forgive people when they hurt us, and indeed, we see this on a national level all the time. Nations don't want to be seen as weak and vulnerable, so they avoid asking for forgiveness for the wrongs they have committed. On a personal level, we do it, too. It is not easy to place one's self in the vulnerable position of asking for forgiveness. However, we have all experienced the relief and grace that comes with not only asking for forgiveness (whether it is granted or not), but also in providing that relief and grace for others. By sharing in the grace that comes in saying or receiving "I'm sorry," we are able to become more than what is natural.


iTunes | Lyrics

Catie's prayer: Steven Curtis Chapman's "Only Natural"

Only natural, only natural

I want to be genuine. I want to be real. I'm not sure that is always the case though. I like to think that I am not fake, but I wonder how many times I'm not. I really hate it when people are fake or you can obviously tell that they are acting fake, but I know I am guilty of it as well. I want to be real though. I'm not really sure what "real" for me is at this point is though.

Katie's prayer: Steven Curtis Chapman's "Only Natural"

There are many things people my age believe to be "natural." Some examples: having sex before marriage, going out and getting drunk every weekend, wearing revealing clothes, taking illegal drugs, getting a C in a class and being ok with it and other such destructive behaviors.

I'm not like them, in fact, I'm the opposite. The reason: Jesus and the high importance I give Him in my life. So I began to think, what would my life be like if I had never gone to lifeteen? How would my life be different if my faith wasn't quite so important? In all honesty, I would probably be exactly like all those other people my age. I wouldn't have the amazing "Jesus-friends" that I have. I would probably be at the bar every weekend. I would have gone a lot further with my first boyfriend. And I probably would have tried and maybe even been successful in committing suicide last semester, cause without Jesus, and without the friends I have because of Jesus and my faith, my life would have been hopeless. So I'm glad I'm not "natural." My life is so much better with Jesus. I'm glad that

I've got the Spirit of the living God alive in me,
Giving me power so I don't have to be
Only natural.

Jen's prayer: Steven Curtis Chapman's "Only Natural"

´Cause when I look at you I see
A prisoner set free from his chains
Acting like he´s still a slave
To the prison he´s been set free from

Isn't this the truth? Even after I am set free from sins, I still look in the mirror and see that old self. Steven talks about how this is natural, but luckily we have a spirit living inside us that makes us supernatural. Awesome.

Jesus, I pray you fill me with your spirit so I don't have to be only natural. Let me see myself through your eyes: free of my past.

Megan's prayer: Steven Curtis Chapman's "Only Natural"

I'd say that most of my appearance is "natural." I still have my natural hair color, I don't wear makeup very often, and I've even started to let my hair dry naturally - a big mop of curls.

I like this naturalness. I'm not trying to hid who I am - I'm happy with showing everyone who I am, naturally.

Today's song made being "only natural" sound like a bad thing, and I guess from the song's viewpoint, it somewhat is. If being natural means living with God, I don't want to be "only natural."

I´ve got the Spirit of the living God alive in me
Giving me power so I don´t have to be
Only natural, only natural

Megan's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Can't Erase It"

But you changed your mind, you let everyone down

This time, last year, I was in the middle of making what is so far the biggest decision of my life. Stay at Dayton, or come home to St. Louis? If I came home, I'd be letting my roommates down, but if I stayed at Dayton, I'd be letting myself down - either way, someone lost.

For months, I didn't know what to do. If I put my roommate's happiness before mine, I wouldn't be happy, but at least they would be happy. And really, what was two more years of college at a school I didn't care for?

If I put my happiness first, wouldn't that be considered selfish? Isn't that saying my individual happiness is more important than a group of people's happiness? I really didn't know the answer to all of these questions.

In the end, I listened to God and followed my heart, and ended up in St. Louis. Turns out all of my friends agreed with God. With God, it wasn't such a hard decision afterall.

Chris' prayer: Jars of Clay's "Can't Erase It"

'Cause love is the best thing for you now
But you changed your mind

It is really hard to love sometimes.

I was talking with a friend of mine last night who is having a hard time letting go of some wrongs someone did to him a year or more ago. He holds those wrong so close to him because they cost him a great deal and have made life a lot harder at times. A lot of hurt and pain in that relationship. And it is really hard to love in a relationship like that.

But those relationships are exactly where we are called to love all that much more. It's hard, but we must challenge ourselves to forgive those who have done us wrong and work toward loving those people. Each of us is in need of extravagant forgiveness, and so we must forgive extravagantly. Each of us is in need of unrestrained love, and so we must love without restraints.

Even when it's really hard.


iTunes | Lyrics

Katie's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Can't Erase It"

Can't erase it? Wait, I thought that's what confession was for. You go to confession your board gets wiped clean. So sins can be erased, but that's the exact opposite of what the song states!

But then I saw the whole quote - YOU can't erase it. That one little word "you" makes all the difference. I personally cannot erase my sin, only God can. And for that, I need confession. That's one statement that's taken me a long time to realize.- I need confession. I haven't always been a big fan of confession. (But let's face it, who is?) I haven't been in quite a while. Maybe God's trying to send me a message via today's song.

Catie's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Can't Erase It"

I think that it is really funny that this is such an up beat song for a topic such as sin. But this song is so true. There are so many times that I can just hit the rewind button and get a redo. I know that God forgives us our sins, but so many times it is harder for me to forgive myself for what I have done. I want to "Wish sometimes for any other you" and actually get it. However, I simply have to know that if God can look past my sin and that with his help I can do that and push myself to be the person that he created me to be.

Jen's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Can't Erase It"

I've always liked Jars of Clay. However, there are times I just don't get the point of the song. This is one of those times. So I could be totally off track, but here's what I'm getting out of it...

I read it first in 1 Peter 4:7 "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins." But since then I've heard it over and over again in the Gospels as I've been reading the New Testament...loving one other covers your sins. This is the way to move on past your sins. The song starts about a person that should "Love everybody now, because love is the best thing for you now." I think those lyrics are referring to those Bible verses. However, the person changes his mind about loving and lets everybody down. Because it's easier that way.

Even though is sucks letting people down, I know that is easier for me to do sometimes rather than stand for what I believe in or love on others.

So the chorus goes...

You know it's so wrong
Can't embrace it
Wish sometimes for any other you
But you can't erase it
And you won't escape it

Sometimes I wish for nothing more than to be some other version of me. Sometimes I hate who I am, but I can't help it. That's how I've felt in the past, but by the end of the song it says...

How long will you face it
Till the weight comes crashing down on you
'Cause you can't erase it, and you won't escape it

Eventually everything in my life started to crumble when I ignored the fact that I wasn't doing what Christ wanted of me. Thankfully, at the point when I can't take the weight anymore, I give it up to God. That's when Jesus comes in and wipes off the dirt in my life and says, "It's okay. Let's start over."

So I feel like this is Jars of Clay saying sometimes you have this pride and you don't want to admit this lifestyle is wrong. But you have to, because it's "so wrong."

Megan's prayer: Overflow's "Cry On My Shoulder"

This song is wonderful, exactly what I needed to hear. God knows what is going on, and he is there to keep me safe, protect me, show me love. I am so lucky.

Come here and cry on my shoulder
I'll hold you till it's over
I'll rescue you tonight.

(:

Chris' prayer: Overflow's "Cry on My Shoulder"

All the lyrics sites will show two lines as follows:

You no longer have to say
No one's listening anyway

But every time I hear them, instead I hear:

You no longer have a say
No one's listening anyway

It's probably just the below-average speakers on my MacBook, or perhaps the below average listening ability I sometimes have. But regardless, I think I like what I hear better than what the lyrics probably actually are. By changing that one little word, the whole tone of the two lines is changed. It transforms from a nice, respectful and safe phrase to a command that must be followed. And sometimes I need that command. Sometimes, I need to be told to grieve, to be sad, to allow things to affect me. Often times it is healthier to get those emotions out, and, I know for me, I often need someone to push me to realize that.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Katie's prayer: Overflow's "Cry on my Shoulder"

I know about what you've been going through.

I sometimes get the thoughts "no one can know how I'm feeling right now" and "even if they knew, they wouldn't be able to help." Because of these stupid thoughts, I keep a lot of stuff in. That is, until things get so backed up on the inside that I have to let it out, usually through crying or through extreme anger and resentment. All because I think that no one could ever feel what I'm feeling. But that's stupid! No matter what I'm feeling, Jesus has experienced it, loneliness, anger, sadness, joy, excitement, abandonment, acceptance, fear, anticipation, optimism, disappointment, everything. One of my favorite quotes from The Passion of the Christ goes something like "Remember when the world hates you, that it hated me first" -Jesus. It so quickly reminds me that I'm not alone in my suffering, I'm not alone in my feelings, I'm not alone, Jesus is right there with me. Jesus is that one person who knows exactly how I'm feeling and the one person who can actually help me through anything. So what else is there to do but to turn to Jesus and listen to Him sing to me...

Come here and cry on my shoulder
I'll hold you 'til it's over
I'll resuce you tonight
Let My arms be your shelter
Your hiding place forever
I'll love you more then life

Jen's prayer: Overflow's "Cry on My Shoulder"

Let my arms be your shelter,
Your hiding place forever.

I'm not sure why, but kids love the game hide-n-seek. They also love to build forts and have secret hideouts and such. I know I did. There's something about having that closed in, quiet place where you felt like the world can't reach you that is so awesome. I feel like lately I have discovered the best shelter or hiding place is in God's arms. I'm safe and secure and there's this feeling that the world can't get me from where I am. God's arms are like the ultimate hiding place where no one can find or bother me. I want to be able to stay in this hiding place forever.

Catie's prayer: Overflow's "Cry on My Shoulder"

Your problems won't last forever
Let Me put you back together

I think that this is extremely difficult for me. When the storms of life come, they seem to last too long, or at least longer than I would like them to stay. It's the same with being broken. It seems as though I might never be fixed and that no one cares enough to help pick up the pieces of my broken life. However, God is always there. He is always willing to put us back together after we've broken, after we've fallen. However, we have to be the one to ask for help in our brokeness for with God we can be made new.

Megan's prayer: Mary Mary's "Somebody"

Everybody has bad days
Where they feel like no one cares

While it's obvious that there are people who do care about me, sometimes I can't realize that, and end up focusing on the negative instead. Everyone knows that life is stressful - but I tend to think that I'm the only one going through it.

What I am in desperate need of right now is a hug. While it's too late at night to find someone to come hug me, I'm excited to instead have the chance to one again experience God's love for me through his embrace.

Chris' prayer: Mary Mary's "Somebody"

And since I've found this love
I want to share it with everyone

There are plenty of things that, the second I know about them, I feel I have to run and tell someone. There's this new song I heard on the radio, I say; you have to hear it. You should check out this book I just finished reading; you'll love it. In fact, just yesterday, I was telling my sister all about this new application I'd downloaded for my computer that I thought she would enjoy.

However, I can't recall the last time I told someone, I've found this love, and I want to share it with you. Cerebrally, I do want to share God's Love with everyone I know, with everyone I meet, and yet, I often fail to do so. And I definitely fail to do so with the enthusiasm and joy of a new song I've just discovered, or a book I just finished, or a piece of software. Sharing God's Love, His joy, with those around me, is something I should be way more excited about.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Jen's prayer: Mary Mary's "Somebody"

Cause every time I'm sad and lonely
He comes and puts His arms around me
Cause God's love is the first
And it is the last

I was very excited to read these lyrics today because it ties into exactly what God is teaching me right now. On Sunday, my pastor at church was discussing the lives of singles. For those of you who don't know me, I am currently single and have been for almost a year. Being single is tough sometimes, especially when everyone around you appears to be a couple. It is easy for me to sulk and feel alone. However, I've been learning that being single can be a gift from God. How can I be sad and lonely when I have God's love wrapping his arms around me? God's love is first and last which means we don't have to have (although it is nice) someone by our side because we already have God.

Katie's prayer: Mayr Mary's "Somebody"

Oh I got a friend who loves me so
You ask how much I'll never know
And since I've found this love
I want to share it with everyone, oh

So I met this boy and I kinda really like him. And I think he might actually really like me too! It's sooooooooo exciting. And even though we haven't been on an actual date, (unless you include going to mass together) I want to tell EVERYONE about this boy. I want everyone to know!

But see there's another boy in my life. And he loves me more than anything! But I don't feel the need to share this with many people. "Oh, well see, she's a die hard atheist, she wouldn't understand." "He's not as into his faith, I couldn't share this with him." "I don't even know her, why would I tell her." "Oh, you're a strong Catholic, ok, I can tell you!" If you haven't guessed, this other boy is Jesus. It's just a tad strange that I want to tell everyone, including people I don't know about a boy that might kinda like me, but I don't have the same urge when it comes to the one person that loves me more than anything.

I am the WORST about evangelizing to people who aren't pious. I do great about discussing my faith and religious experiences and what I feel God is putting on my heart with my friends who are pious. I don't do so great at discussing those things with people who I know are a different religion from me, who I know aren't as strong in their faith, or who I don't even know at all, or even those people I'm not sure of their beliefs. But that's no how it's supposed to be. Jesus didn't say "Go, therefore, and make disciples SOME people." No, He said: "Go, therefore, and make disciples of ALL nations" (Matthew 28:19, emphasis mine). I should be sharing my faith with everyone I meet.

Catie's prayer: Mary Mary's "Somebody"

Oh I got a friend who loves me so
You ask how much I'll never know
And since I've found this love
I want to share it with everyone, oh

Somedays, I know God loves me. I know it and I can see it- it is very clear for me to see. Whether it be while I'm sitting in the chapel or just walking around campus, I just get this sense that I am loved more than I'll ever know. Yesterday was not one of those days. I mean I know that God loves me, but yesterday I just couldn't wrap my heart around it. I was too busy wondering why I'm so incredibly human to be able to receive God's love. But ijn order for us to love like God, we need to be able to openly receive God's love. Today, I pray for the openness to be able to receive (so that I might better give) God's love.

Megan's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Crazy Times"

I'm a big fan of keeping track of my "accomplishments" in life. Whether it is how many days in a row I have showered, or how many Core team meetings in a row I have attended, or how many days have I gone without biting my fingernails, I find joy in counting up these days and saying to myself "Wow! Good job!"

But all of these streaks eventually come to an end, and require me to start back over at the beginning. I'm not a big fan of starting over, it seems like I've failed cause I wasn't able to keep that streak alive.

One of the most important "accomplishments" that I'm tracking right now is my ability to remain positive about my schoolwork and relationship, focus on the good instead of bad, and not allow myself to be overwhelmed with stress. I was doing really well - had hit a streak of a few weeks - until today.

I went to bed last night frustrated with my lack of motivation, and that continued into today. During classes, I began to feel completely overwhelmed, and not sure how it was all going to get done before the semester is over. Even my relationships seemed to suffer today - I couldn't see the good, and instead focused on the bad.

I'm just left here, sitting in bed, exhausted, wondering what tomorrow will bring. My streak of three weeks came to an end, and I'm not handling that well.

Seems sometime ago you said
This wouldn't last
And now you sit here crying
Beside your bed.

I pray that tomorrow is better. I pray that the streak that starts tomorrow is unending.

Jen's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Crazy Times"

Beside your bed
You kneel in the dark...
It takes more than your saline eyes
To make things right

A lot of times I whine and complain to God. I say, "I hate how this is..." or "Why can't you fix this..." Yet I can cry all I want out to him, but it takes an effort on my part too. At the end of this song, when the person actually kneels down to pray, things can become right. My random outbursts to God aren't the same as kneeling before God, humbling myself before Him and asking Him how he wants things. He would love to help me out, but I have to make an effort, too. I need to be open to His ways and obey what He wants.

Katie's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Crazy Times"

It takes more than your saline eyes
To make things right

I'll admit it, I'm a big crier. Sometimes, just a little cry makes everything seem so much better! Almost every time I go to Adoration, I cry. If I'm not crying, then I'm actually not attending Adoration, at least not mentally, my mind is somewhere else besides talking to God. I really don't know why I have this compulsive crying issue, but like a good chick flick, it makes me feel so much better. Unlike a good chick flick, Adoration does seem to solve the stress and sometimes even gives me answers to my problems. But like the song states, everything isn't going to be magically better because I cried during Adoration. After I leave, I have to work on those things God put on my heart. The problem is that it doesn't always happen. I had things placed on my heart many many many times, but I've only done anything about them during Adoration through conversing with God. I haven't changed outside that small chapel where I cried.

Chris' prayer: Jars of Clay's "Crazy Times"

I lose things more than I care to admit. I don't mean lose as in "forever" lose, although I do that quite a bit. I mean "temporarily misplace." I'm constantly having to look for my keys, my book, my phone, my mail, and whatever else I might need to find before I was supposed to leave 5 minutes ago.

I always seem to wind up looking for these things in places where I know they could not possibly be. Why would my keys be in the bathroom? Why would my book be in the closet? Why would that one shirt be in the kitchen cabinets? I'm not sure why, but that's the way it happens, with me eventually finding my stuff right where it was supposed to be, much like the subject of today's song, who spends two verses, two refrains, and a bridge trying to dig herself out of a hole before realizing where she was supposed to be all along:

Beside your bed
You kneel in the dark

YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Catie's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Crazy Times"

To make things right

I need to make things right. There are some things I need to figure out with God's help, but I've been avoiding it. I'm not ready to face God, not ready to see what God wants me to do in the situations I put myself into. I'm scared of what he might expect of me and scared that I won't have the courage to do what he wants me to do. So I avoid him. I talk and talk and talk in prayer, but don't give time to listen in fear of what he might tell me to do in the silence of my heart. However, I can't go on like this. I need to make things right.

Katie's prayer: Kutless' "Perspectives"

If feels like your life's crashing down all around you.

Three weeks from today, I will graduate from college. I'm getting ready to leave behind the world I've always known. I've gone to school since I was 5, and suddenly, I have to change that?! Not only that, but I have to find a job too! And before I do that, I have to decide where I'm going to live! And there are friends leaving that I might not ever see again, cause let's face it, there's always talk of "oh we'll see each other, we'll get together at some point in the future." but it never really happens. So many things are coming to an end, and I really don't want them too. My world IS crashing down around me.

Let me ask if it's really so bad

If you think about it though, it's not all that bad. I'm privileged that I can even go to college, much less graduate. I'm privileged to have such great friends that I never want to leave. I'm privileged to have the awesome resume I have and the amazing possibilities of jobs before me. I'm privileged. Other people are not as lucky as me. There are many out there who I'm sure would much rather be in my position of not knowing what's next, but having many possibilities. Sometimes it's so easy for me to forget about them and worry only about me

Chris' prayer: Kutless' "Perspectives"

Freedom is sometimes just simply another perspective away

This song reminds me of a trick I taught myself several years ago when I was waiting tables.

There would be days at the restaurant where nothing was going right. The managers were on me for not keeping the side stations stocked, a customer was mad because I had taken just too long to get her refill, the bussers were mad because I was not helping out with bussing the tables, and the cooks, well, the cooks were always mad. I just couldn't catch a break, and my perspective would suffer. I would reflect the anger placed on me outward and be in a bad mood.

It was clearly not a healthy situation. One particular instance, though, I reminded myself that Christmas was coming up, and I began to sing to myself one of my favorite Advent hymns, just repeating "Prepare ye the way of the Lord," to myself over and over again. Bus a table– prepare ye, stock the side station– the way of the Lord. I would focus on nothing outside of that song as I went around doing whatever it was I was supposed to be doing. That was my prayer, repeated again and again.

And slowly, my mood would change. A favorite song, even when heard at a bad time, still had the power to turn my day around. And it's a trick that I still use to this day when nothing seems to be going right. Freedom [from my sour mood] really is sometimes just another perspective away.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Megan's prayer: Kutless' "Perspectives"

Why can't you see that freedom is sometimes simply another perspective away?

I've been told that misery loves company. This semester has been a perfect example of this. School has been overwhelmingly stressful and full of projects. When you are surrounded by 30 other girls going through the exact same thing, it becomes very easy to have a pity party.

And we partied hard this semester. Before classes, after classes, at lunch, sometimes even during class. Even a few teachers would join in. It has just been a stressful semester.

Why can't you see that freedom is sometimes simply another perspective away?

While the number of assignments due has not decreased, a new perspective has been helping me deal with the stress a bit better. Instead of being held back by the stress and only focusing on that, I've freed myself from it. I know that my work will get done, I just need to stay focused and have a positive attitude. The pity parties got me no where. I've finally realized that in order to make this a successful semester, I have to take a new perspective. I have to trust in myself, and trust in the fact that everything will get done, and that everything will turn out okay in the end.

Catie's prayer: Kutless' "Perspectives"

It feels like your life's crashing down all around you
Let me ask if it's really so bad
Look at the world in it's suffering
Can you honestly tell me that know one else could understand
All of the hurting inside

So many times I forget that my life isn't that bad. I get complaining about how I have too much to do, about a class I don't like, whatever. I forget that there are such bigger problems in the world than mine. I also forget that there other people who get it. They understand what I'm going through and we could help each other out if open to it. God puts people in our lives for a reason. He knows what we're going through. He's there to help us. God puts other people in our lives at certain points in our life for a reason. They are put there by God to help us along the way. God is there for us always, but we have to be the one to go to him.

Jen's prayer: Kutless' "Perspectives"

Ha. Ha.
That's what I thought of as soon as I read the first two lines of "Perspectives":

It feels like your life's crashing down all around you
Let me ask if it's really so bad

I have had an additional stress since my newspaper started doing a weekly video on a popular television show. We aren't tech savvy, so it's been interesting. One week the video is too long and can't be uploaded, then this week the audio comes in and out due to a software malfunction. It gets to be so frustrating and then as I sit down to do this blog and I read, "Let me ask if it's really so bad." Ummm...no. It's not. On Tuesday night I was at a Bible study and we were praying that we would be able to find a peace and rest in Jesus. That we would be able to not let these life's distractions get us down. Because when you're in constant prayer, little things seem just that - little. Yet here it is just a few days later and I'm letting life's little frustrations and distractions like stupid electronics get in my way. Tsk Tsk, Jen. I'm praying that God changes my perspective so I can see things through His eyes where little stuff is no problem.

Megan's prayer: Kutless "I Lift Up My Eyes"

Lately, I've been having a very hard time coming up with original thoughts and words during prayer. My mind goes blank. Lucky for me, my daily prayer is centered around prayanewsong's daily song. Even Masses and adorations are filled with either reading or singing. I'm able to talk to God through these words found in the music.

Tonight at adoration, I was having a hard time finding a song that I could use as my prayer. I couldn't sing "Overwhelm Me," which is one of my favorites, because that was not the prayer in my heart. I don't know if I can handle being even more overwhelmed right now. The song that did stick with me was "Hold My Hand." What a beautiful, perfect prayer for my life right now.

Tonight's prayanewsong song was able to give me a similar feeling.

Oh how I need you Lord
You are my only hope
You're my only prayer

Chris' prayer: Kutless' "I Lift My Eyes Up"

Tonight, I went to Exalt!, my church's praise and worship/Adoration/Holy Hour. For the testimony, my Youth Ministry Director was asked to give a talk on new life. It was fitting that he was giving the talk, seeing how he and his wife had given birth to their first child just three weeks prior.

To begin his talk, Bob read from the tenth chapter of John:

10 I came so that they might have life and have it more abundantly.

How perfect it was, then, to come home tonight and listen to today's song, where Jon Sumrall sings the same thing: to come and give me life. Sometimes I think, as Christians, we get caught up in Good Friday– Jesus coming to die for our sins, and, as strange as it sounds, overlook, or diminish Easter Sunday. Yes, the dying for our sins part is very important, but it is the rising that is crucial- He came that we might have life.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Catie's prayer: Kutless' "I Lift My Eyes Up"

where does my help come from?

My help should come from God. I should constantly be turning to him with whatever I need and trust in him to take care of me. However this doesn't always happen. I rely on trying to fix the problem myself, trying to turn to other people, whatever, before going to God. However, if I would just go to God in the first place and let him guide me, the problem would be fixed how God wanted it to be instead of how I or someone else thinks it should be. And since we are suppose to be work to do God's will, this is something I should try to do day in and day out throughout my everyday life. The hits in life would be much easier to take if we just gave them up to God.

Katie's prayer: Kutless' "I lift my eyes up"

oh how I need you Lord

That statement could not be more true! I desperately need God, like all the time! (: But sometimes I forget that. My mind tricks me into thinking I don't need God, I can do it all by myself. And sometimes I will follow this way of thinking for a while. Then I realize how stupid that is, and turn back, only to trick myself again later. There's always a constant back and forth pull, always. The realization of this phrase is the one thing that always brings me back. If I could just constantly keep that in mind, I wouldn't have a problem.

Jen's prayer: Kutless' "I lift my eyes up"

So the first few lines from this song come directly from Psalm 121:1-2

¹ I lift up my eyes to the hills—
where does my help come from?

² My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

It makes sense, then, that in the following verses when Kutless sings about needing God's help, that of course you'd want it from the Maker of heaven and earth! Who better to help you than God! But after thinking about it, I realized how guilty I am of going to other people first before God. When I'm frustrated I should immediately pray to God, but sometimes I forget and call up a friend to vent and gossip. My prayer today is to remember that all my help should come from God. He is my only hope.

Megan's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Fade to Grey"

I see your love is willing
To turn me inside out

But the real question right now is "Am I willing?" I want to be able to say "yes!" and have God come and completely transform me. I want to be able to give over all control of my life to God, but I have such a hard time with that.

I know God is always there, waiting for me to give him the green light and let him transform my life, but I haven't been able to yet. Some days are better than others, and I'm able to allow myself to give up that control, but it has never been to the extent that I long for.

I'm sure the fact that I fear the unknown plays a big part in why I hold on so tightly to control of my life, but what is there to fear if my life is in God's hands?

Chris' prayer: Jars of Clay's "Fade to Grey"

But in my state of blind confusion
No God can pull me out

This line caught my eye the first time I listened to this song because I didn't really understand what Dan Haseltine meant. No God can pull me out? But my God is all powerful. He can do whatever He wants. And then I remembered- He can do whatever He wants...except for one thing. He won't force Himself on us. We have the freedom to turn toward or away from God, and He respects that choice. The only reason God couldn't, or wouldn't, pull me out of a state of blind confusion would be because I don't let Him.

Sadly, there are plenty of times where I don't let God in on what I'm doing. I try to keep Him boxed up and let Him be around only when it is convenient, or only when it is easy. But blind confusion is not easy. I need to let God into the tough times, into all times.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Catie's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Fade to Grey"

They keep me in chains and I wish they'd release me

I know many times it is not the world that is keeping me chained, but it is myself. I've noticed lately how much a hold on to my sin. Instead of letting God take the weight, take my sin, I hold on because I have trouble forgiving myself. It's something I've talked to others about before but it is something that is so much easier said than done. For me, it is so much easier to forgive others than it is for me to forgive myself. But if God, who is all-knowing and knows every sin I've ever committed and yet is able to forgive me, why shouldn't I forgive myself?

Katie's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Fade to Grey"

Your trance of love is seeking

(I know the line goes past that, but I'm stopping it there.)
It's so easy for me to think "God love us" but much harder for me to think "God loves me." I know God loves me, but I can't ever seem to realize just how much He loves me. Even if I was the only person on earth, Jesus still would have come and died for me. He not only loves me, He's seeking me out, because of this love! I'm like a little wandering kid in a toy store, and God, my Father, is constantly running after me to bring me back to Him because He loves me and He knows that's what's best for me. I'm praying I'll be able to stay close to God this time. I'm praying I won't be so easily distracted by the many shinny, distracting toys.

Jen's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Fade to Grey"

And if you follow me
You'll see all the black, all the white fade to grey

As a follower of Christ, I see most things in black and white. The Bible makes it pretty clear what is right and wrong. So when I was reading the Fade to Grey lyrics I got a bit confused. Why, if I'm following God, would things go from black and white to grey? I was thinking, doesn't God want us to be hot or cold, not lukewarm? Why would we want to fade to grey? Doesn't that mean we aren't standing strong in our beliefs?

After I talked it out with my mom I realized this is a different kind of black and white. So often religious people see things black and white. We should do this to become saved, and this to lead others to Christ and sinners do this, etc. A good example is the Pharisees in the Bible. They did all the right things, but there was no faith involved. Jesus got super annoyed by the Pharisees. However, when we embrace Jesus and his teachings and become more like Him, our thinking begins to change. We are humbled and realize how little we know. Things aren't so black and white because we're continually realizing the greatness of God and how little we are in comparison. Things fade from black and white to grey because it's less of us and more of God. When we allow God to turn us "inside out" as the song says, we are humbled and challenged in our beliefs because we're having a more Christ-like outlook on things instead. Basically, this song is reminding me that I need to decrease so He can increase.

Does that make sense?

Megan's prayer: Falling Up's "Ambience"

About three months ago, I wrote about the joy that I find in going to bed early, wrapping myself with blankets, and just being in God's presence. What I never shared was what happened after I posted my blog that night. I snuggled into bed, very close to falling asleep, when I was overwhelmed with the feeling that God loved me. It was so calming, so peaceful. I think about that night often.

Today's song reminded me:

Listen deep, you'll hear the sound
Whispering, it's all around

Chris' prayer: Falling Up's "Ambience"

Listen deep, You'll hear that sound
Whispering, it's all around

I just started reading Michael Yaconelli's Dangerous Wonder in hopes of using it in a small group this summer. In the first chapter, Yaconelli talks about the voice of God speaking to us, but not in loud, thunderous tones as we read about in the Bible, but rather in whispers. God is always speaking to us, Yaconelli continues, but at some point, our lives get too filled with *stuff* to hear the whispers. Too much homework to do, too many meetings to go to, too many commitments to fulfill.

This line from Ambience reminded me of that for obvious reasons. His voice is everywhere. It's all around. I just have to take the time, and retrain my ears, to listen.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Katie's prayer: Falling Up's "Ambience"

Last year was a very trying time in my faith. I felt alone often, in both my life and my spiritual life. I think the problem stemmed from how my roommate and others on my floor treated me. For reasons unknown, they delighted in talking about me behind my back, ignoring me when I was around, messing with my stuff and so on. I prayed for the year to end and end quickly. I prayed that they would change, they would realize how horrible they were being, and they would stop. My big summer project was learning to forgive those girls for everything they had done to me. The main reason behind my urgency in forgiving them was because I believed one of them, my roommate, would die from brain cancer over the summer.

Away from these girls, it was easier to get back into my faith life, and with that extra boost of faith, I was able to forgive them. The hurt they caused returned when I got back to school and found out my roommate was a pathological liar. Among many other lies, the biggest - she never had brain cancer. It has been very hard for me to move on past this. The anger and resentment I felt towards them, particularly my roommate, resurfaced. In my mind, I took back my forgiveness. And in all honesty, I still hold on to some of that. But I feel, as I have for a while that I "MUST move on."

It's finally time to completely forgive them for everything, all the hurt and loneliness they made me to feel and for all the lies that were told. Holding onto a grudge is only going to hurt me and definitely not what God wants for me.

Jen's prayer: Falling Up's "Ambience"

The first thing I noticed about this song was the title: Ambience. First of all, I spell it ambiance and got confused by its spelling, so I had to look up the definition to see if there's a difference. There isn't. The definition caught my eye, though: "ambience is a particular environment or surrounding influence." In college I had a surrounding influence that was not positive and it dragged me down. I allowed the surrounding people to influence me and make me believe I would be happier if I was more like the world. I have never abandoned my faith as much as I did my senior year of college. I found that the more I withdrew from God, the worse things got for me. It was a learning experience and I've grown from it, but this song reminds me of what it was like then. Especially this part:

So I stand, all alone
With no chance, on my own
Will I just sustain, moving on in vain?
Cause this glow, you and I
Have come to know, is a lie
And we must move on

Being raised a Christian and then falling away from Christ is one of the scariest things I've experienced. I was alone with "no chance on my own." The question was, was I going to be too vain and prideful to admit to Jesus that I messed up and needed Him? I'm a very prideful person and hate to admit mistakes and somehow admitting to Jesus that I had severely screwed up and could not do things alone was one of the most difficult things ever. However, just like this song says, "we must move on." I had to move on, out of that ambience at school and back into Jesus' arms. I am so thankful for Jesus' intricate love that accepted me again and loves me even more than I can imagine.

Catie's prayer: Falling Up's "Ambience"

This love is so intricate I feel it taking

God's love. It's something I write about on here a lot I think. But if we all realized how much God loved each of us, the world would be such a different place. The intricate, gentle, powerful love our Lord has for each of us is so incredibly wonderful. To have someone know our inmost being and still love us all the more. It's beautiful. The love of God will take us to new heights, things we couldn't even dream of, if we let it.

Catie's prayer: Cheer Up Charlie's "Only One"

Cause you live in repetition

I live in repetition it feels like. While my days are very different, they are very much routine at the same time. I know there is more to life than this. God doesn't want us to be in a routine, he wants us to go out of our way, out of our comfort zones, out of ourselves to live for him. But repetition can be comfortable, we like our comfort zones, we like the familiar. However, we can't reach for more, if we continue to settle.

Chris' prayer: Cheer Up Charlie's "Only One"

I love the intro to this song. It seemingly has nothing at all to do with the song, just a kid strumming a guitar and making up words as he goes. Even the melody stands in stark contrast to the sound which directly follows it. But it reminds me so much of my own life and how I often live my life.

Many times, I feel like such a child in my faith. Like I should be more mature, or more responsible, like I should have mastered some of the same old sins I struggle with. I keep forgetting how to get past them, much the way the child in the song forgets the words to the song he has just come up with.

This song is not much of a happy one at all, reminding me again and again of my failures. And, despite its seeming innocence, the introduction, in its own way, does the same thing.


iTunes | Lyrics

Katie's prayer: Cheer Up Charlie's "Only One"

And when the day is done, there is only one there is only one

There is so much going on in my life right now, so many things demanding my attention. School, friends, lifeteen, FOCUS, the ever approaching graduation, people constantly questioning me about my plans for next year, the stress that comes with all of this, I could go on and on for days. It's so easy for me to get caught up in these various things and how I want them to turn out. Not that trying to figure out my life and what I want for my life is wrong. Where it becomes wrong is where I'm so caught up in what I want, that I don't stop and consider what God wants for me.

At the end of the day I need to remind myself, there is only one thing that matters in this life - God. If I put my trust in HIM, everything else will fall into place. I won't have to worry about next year, graduation, anything, God will provide, it's way past time for me to fully realize how true this is.

Megan's prayer: Cheer Up Charlie's "Only One"

Before the song even starts, before the singers from Cheer Up Charlie even sing their first lines, there is a child singing “listen to God, listen to God everyday.” I absolutely fell in love with this part of the song. It is so simple, so pure and innocent.

I’ve been around little kids quite often this semester since a lot of my classes require classroom experience. Even though I am supposed to be the one teaching them, I have learned a lot from them this semester. The most recently was when I was working with a boy in 3rd grade. We had just finished reading a story about a skunk. At the end, I asked him what he learned from the story. He told me that “I learned that animals and people are beautiful no matter what they smell like or look like. What matters is how they treat other people.” I was floored. From a simple story about a skunk, he was able to gain so much insight into what is important in life.

Maybe I should start thinking more like a child. Maybe this simple and innocent view is the key to happiness. Instead of over analyzing things or making life more difficult that it should be, I should focus on the simple things in life.

Jen's prayer: Cheer Up Charlie's "Only One"

You do it again, You do it again
Save face, butcher grace but your fine with it...

Your fine with it living in your blatant deceit
You’ve taken grace and bleed it dry with every lie you breathe
And so you breathe and so you breathe and so you bleed
How are you fine with the lie you are leading
Its only time, this isn’t right
To act like grace can be changed to fit your lie, to fit your lie

I think one of the hardest things for Christians is knowing the power of grace and abusing it. We think that knowing that Jesus will forgive us for anything is an excuse for us to go out and sin... "we take grace and bleed it dry with every lie" because in the end we can ask for forgiveness and start over again. After all, grace is about receiving forgiveness when we don't deserve it.

I feel like this song is talking about those who abuse grace and I know this is something I'm guilty of doing. I'll tell myself it's no big deal if I cave in just this once because God's got my back and will forgive me when I feel guilty later on and ask Him to forgive me. It took many years for me to realize I have to change my ways and truly feel convicted of that sin in order to be redeemed of my ways. Jesus knows when I'm truly wanting forgiveness from a sin. His grace is an amazing gift and definitely not something I should take lightly.

Megan's prayer: Michelle Tumes "For the Glory of Your Name"

Although I have been told the story of the Passion many times before, this year feels like the first year that I actually heard what was being said. At last week's lifenight, we talked about suffering, and heard a detailed description of the suffering Christ went through. At tonight's service, the thing that stuck with me the most from the Passion story was Jesus being pierced in the side which caused water and blood to flow from his body. I had heard these words before, but they had never really made an impact until tonight.

For the blood You shed was perfect

I feel that this is almost a bitter sweet line. While I understand the tradgedy that comes with the Passion, I was also reminded that this act is what God wanted. This death is a symbol of just how deep Jesus' love is, that he would suffer for me. His death and resurrection marks the beginning of a new life for everyone.

Chris' prayer: Michelle Tumes' "For the Glory of Your Name"

Where we wounded One so holy
Yet these wounds are life to us

I love the contradiction in these two lines. For it is through our sinfulness that we are able to experience the redemptive power of God's Love. It is through those wounds that we inflict on Jesus that we are able to be washed clean by His blood.

I'll leave it at that. A simple thought as my last post before celebrating His resurrection. The ultimate triumph of Love. Peace be with all of you.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Catie's prayer: Michelle Tumes' "For the Glory of Your Name"

Hanging there upon a cross
Where we wounded One so holy

Today is Good Friday, the day we as Catholics celebrate what Christ did for us on the cross. The perfect act of love, to lay down one's life for a friend. He did not have to die for us, he could have left us to die and we wouldn't have the same hope for salvation. Yet he didn't do that. He loved us so much as to endure the most painful death known to man. That is a great love. To die to one's self so that others may live. There are many things we can do throughout our day to die to self. It is only when we seize those opportunities that we can become one with the risen Christ.

Megan's prayer: Andy Cloninger's "Walk On"

I enjoy being in control of my life. Giving up this control, trusting someone with my life, and becoming vulnerable is very hard for me.

I admire the trust the Jesus had in his father. Although the path that God laid out for him was a hard path to follow, Jesus walked on.

I hope to give up that control in my life, to trust God completely with where he leads me - knowing that his plans for my life are much better than anything I could come up with.

Chris' prayer: Andy Cloninger's "Walk On"

Lord, you were worn out and
Lord, you felt like this before

Strangely enough, even though I have absolutely no idea what it means, it is somehow easier for me to think of Jesus Christ as fully God. I often forget that He was fully man as well, and experienced the same emotions that I feel today. He, too, was worn out after a long day. He, too, experienced sadness, fear, pain, as well as joy, hope, strength. He, too, wasn't sure about what He was being called to do. No matter what I'm feeling, I need to remember that my God has, too, felt these same emotions. He knows what I'm going through.

I'm not alone, no, I'm not alone
I have a God who's felt this way before

iTunes

Catie's prayer: Andy Cloninger's "Walk on"

Still you walked on

I think for me sometimes this is the hardest part. While most of time I am relatively driven, there are other times I just want to throw in the towel. However, Christ endured more the harshest punishment known to man, and he continued to walk on, he continued to forgive, he continued to love, even to the point of death. He walked on for you, for me, for all of us. Holy week is a time that we focus in on the great sacrifice Christ made out of love. We focus on how much God loves us. In my mind, there is nothing better to focus on as we approach the celebration of the resurrected Christ.

Megan's prayer: Raze's "Always and Forever"

Today's song made me feel a bit sad. As I listened, I reminisced about all of the "best friends" I have had over the years. It's no surprise that they have changed over the years as I have grown, but it is sad to think about all of those relationships that are now just memories.

What I ended up focusing on wasn't the past friendships, but the current ones. The line that really stuck with me was "miles and miles and miles are between us." I instantly thought of two of my favorite people who are currently 360 miles away from me.

Although I went from seeing them 2 times a week in class, plus on weekends last year, to only once every 3-4 months now, things haven't changed much, and that thrills me. When I get the chances to see them, we pick up right where we left off. Whether they like it or not, they are going to be my friends for a long time still to come.

I think it's no coincidence that we all met in a religion class. I truly feel blessed.

Chris' prayer: Raze's "Always and Forever"

There are a significant number of songs in my iTunes that I have "accidentally" run into. Songs that I never would have discovered if it weren't for some happy accident. This is one of those songs. This is the last track from the WOW 2000 CD, which was given to me by a friend. There are some wonderful Christian tracks on that CD. All kinds of songs about praising God, and listening to Him, and worshiping Him, and thanking Jesus, and then there is this song, sitting there at the end of the CD. Not explicitly Christian, it almost doesn't seem to fit with the rest of the music on the CD.

But it probably became the most played track from that CD. Just a simple message about friends who are there for us through all the ups and the downs, this track reminds me where I find a lot of the love that God has for me. I am so loved and so cared for by my friends. They show me, whether they are Christian or not, whether they attend services weekly or yearly or not at all, just how much God loves me. And they show me how long He will love me, too:

Always and forever.

YouTube | Lyrics

Catie's prayer: Raze's "Always and Forever"

we will be friends(strong)
forever and ever

There have been many times throughout my life where I felt abandoned, alone, like I had no one to run to. However, so many times I forget to look to Christ as a friend, someone there to help me out, someone who is my friend. A friend that will never leave, no matter how bad the storm gets, no matter how stubborn I'm being, whatever. He's in it with each of us, forever and ever.

Megan's prayer: Point of Grace's "Saving Grace"

I used to be a proud owner of a "WWJD?" bracelet. I wore it probably over 2 years. But although I wore it, I don't know how often I really thought about the question that was written on my wrist.

What would Jesus do?

Now, more than ever in my life, I find myself focusing on the answer to that question. I believe that the answer is "love." Jesus was God's perfect example of love that he showed to the world. Jesus' death is the perfect example of how much he loved the world. I think that if I was able to show even 1% of that love to others, I could change the world.

(It's) all about living love
Being Jesus to those he came to save

What could happen if we all loved just a little more? What would happen if we all took on the task of "being Jesus" to others?

Chris' prayer: Point of Grace's "Saving Grace"

We have to go where she lives

On a retreat a couple years ago, I was in a small group and we were sharing different things about ourselves. One of the questions was something like, "What is your best trait?" I was genuinely struggling to come up with something I really liked for an answer; something that was truthful and meaningful. The other adult in the small group said, "Chris, I think you are wonderful at making people feel comfortable."

I thought about it for a moment and I really hoped it was true. I believe that it is. It is something that I find so important, especially within youth ministry. I feel that, if I'm going to affect these teens in any real and meaningful way, if they are going to give me a chance, then they need to feel comfortable. And they are going to feel comfortable on their terms, on their turf. I need to be there, and not expect them to come to me. I've said a thousand times, "We need to meet them where they are. We need to love them for who they are."

I may be struggling with my calling to youth ministry, but that is one thing that does not waiver, and one thing that I definitely still enjoy- showing teenagers how much God loves them.


iTunes | Lyrics

Catie's prayer: Point of Grace's "Saving Grace"

All about living love
Being Jesus to those he came to save
Sharing life and giving our own away
It's all about serving God

The above lines are what life is about. This is how we are suppose to live our lives. We are to show God's love to all, not just our family and friends, not just those who are extremely lovable. EVERYONE needs to be loved, respected, and cared for. Even if they are the most bitter, hateful person in the world, how will they ever know how to love if they never experience it? They won't. It is up to each of us to make sure that each person we come in contact with knows that they are cared for, knows that they are loved for it is through loving each other that we can best serve God.

Megan's prayer: Selah's "Be Thou Near to Me"

I had never heard this song until today, but I instantly fell in love with it. The lyrics are absolutely wonderful, but what struck me more was the calm melody in the background.

I was introduced to Jim Brickman, the pianist in this song, a few months ago. I have always enjoyed listening to piano players, and his music was no exception. He plays beautifully. There have been many nights where I would listen to the few songs of his that I had on my iTunes over and over, in an attempt to help me fall asleep. They always brought a soothing, calming peace over me.

Today's song was no different than the rest of his music. It brought peace, along with my prayer for the night, found within the lyrics.

O Lord, be thou near to me.

Chris' prayer: Selah's "Be Thou Near to Me"

Seeking the joy of love unspoken

When I was in college, my then-girlfriend and I worked at the same restaurant, and many times worked the same shifts together. One such time, she was working as the To Go server, while I was on the floor with four or five tables. She had already had a rough morning and a To Go shift was not the remedy at all. There wasn't much money to be made in that shift, but there was still a significant amount of work to be done. Her day was getting worse.

I caught one of her two or three total customers standing at the end of the bar waiting for the food to be bagged up and brought out. I asked this wonderful middle aged African American woman to do me a favor. I handed her a $20 bill and asked that she give it to her server, saying only that the woman noticed she was having a tough day and that she deserved so much more. The woman complied and that small gesture (and an abnormally large tip) turned my then-girlfriend's day around.

I never told her that it was me who gave the woman the money or the instructions. The satisfaction, the joy of that moment came in showing someone that they are loved and cared for without saying a word, without taking the credit. Seeing someone I cared about be happy was very much worth it for me.

I need to find more of those moments where I can seek the joy of love unspoken.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Catie's prayer: Selah's "Be Thou Near to Me"

Oh Lord, be Thou near to me.

I feel like this is more or less my prayer on and off throughout my life depending on what is going on. However, it should be my prayer constantly. No matter what is going on in my life, whether I'm singing praises or going through a storm, the prayer should always be "Oh Lord, be Thou near to me."

Chris' prayer: Out of Eden's "River"

Some try to tell me
That there's another something
That fulfills like You do

Forget "some."

*I* try to tell myself that there is another something that will fulfill me, that will make me happy, that will complete me. I may not say it explicitly, but in my actions I profess this almost daily. With the way I act, with the way I go through my day, with the way I treat others, sometimes it is painfully obvious that I am trying to fill myself with things that are not God. Unfortunately, despite how often it occurs, I don't do a good enough job of catching myself in the act. I only realize after the fact that I was putting something else before God, or seeking solace or happiness from it.

How blessed I am to have a God who is patient, kind, and merciful. He is always there waiting for me. He never leaves. Never gets frustrated. Never quits. He will outlast all of my sins, all of the times I try to fill myself with something other than Him, and then, when I'm finally done being selfish and turn toward Him, He will be there with loving arms surrounding me. How great is my God!


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Megan's prayer: Out of Eden's "River"

When the mountains fall, when the stars collide
I know you'll be there, standing by my side

This past year, I've tried really hard to be independent. I live by myself, cook for myself, and I am responsible for paying the bills on time. It's something I didn't know if I would be able to do it all by myself, but I took a chance.

Although it has been going well for the most part, sometimes I do come to a road block. I wish I could figure everything out on my own, but there are times when I have to swallow my pride, and ask for help from others.

And every time this happens, without any question, my parents are there for me. Ready to help me. No questions asked. They will do everything possible to help me through the hard times, whether it is something physical they can give, like a helping hand with rent, or just my mom's offer to drive down to my apartment just to be with me when I have a bad night. They love me so much.

As great as their love is for me, I know God's love is even more. He will always be there, standing by my side. This is amazing.

Catie's prayer: Out of Eden's "River"

I know You'll be there
And You will still be lovin' me

I don't have too much to say about this except for the fact that I need to remember this. There has been nothing else in my life that has comforted me more than knowing that God is there for me, loving me no matter what. If only I could keep that constantly on my mind and heart.

Megan's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Liquid"

He didn't die for nothing

When I think about how Jesus died for my sins, I don't think I fully grasp just how awesome that love is.

Would I really give my life to save someone elses? Would I give my life to stand up for my faith?

I like to think that I could answer "yes" to these questions, but would that change if I actually found myself in that situation?

Chris' prayer: Jars of Clay's "Liquid"

He didn't die for nothing.

This is the line that will always stick out to me. Always. I've seen Jars of Clay perform in concert probably 8-10 times and this is the song I look forward to. It isn't my favorite song from them, but that doesn't even matter. I want to hear this one. And I want to hear it for this line. The whole song builds and builds and builds until finally it can no longer be contained. And what comes out is this line sung, no...screamed...by the entire audience.

And what a great reminder it is with Easter Sunday right around the corner.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Catie's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Liquid"

He didn't die for nothing

So many times I forget this. I forget that he died for me, you, everyone. It's one thing to to give of your life, but to actually die the most horrific death ever out of LOVE. Love is something that can be so difficult, but when it works the way is it suppose to, to be completely self-giving, to truly will the good of another, there is nothing more beautiful

Megan's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Flood"

Many times when I feel overwhelmed, the only way I can find to express that is by crying. Sometimes this is an okay thing. When I have this overwhelming sense of joy or happiness in my life, it happens. When I watch Extreme Makeover Home Edition and I see just how much people care for one another, it happens. When I feel an overwhelming sense of love from someone, it happens.

It also happens when I'm overwhelmed with school work, with stress, with frustration. Those are not the most enjoyable times. It's during these times that I need to remember to turn to God, to ask him to "calm the storms that drench my eyes, dry the streams still flowing."

Chris' prayer: Jars of Clay's "Flood"

I remember hearing this song on the radio when it was first released. It was actually even before I had really taken ownership of my faith and invested into my spiritual life. Nonetheless, the feeling I had then is one that I continue to have today: I find myself amazed whenever something spiritual or religious, whether it be a song like this one, a book, or a television show "crosses over" and becomes mainstream. It catches me off guard to find the secular world catching on to something religious.

It probably shouldn't surprise me. I think I recall hearing that something like 90% of Americans believe in God, and something like 80% identify themselves as Christian. It seems like the secular world is so far removed from that statistic, though...that God is part of our lives on Sundays for an hour, then perhaps a minute before meals, and then contained in privacy for the rest of the week. It is refreshing, and yes, amazing, when we as a culture allow Him to escape that box and make an impact on our secular world.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Catie's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Flood"

Lift me up - keep me from drowning again

There have been many times in my life when I felt like I was drowning. Not literally but in the sense that I was in way over my head. Earlier this week I felt like this. I just had so many little things that had built up and I felt entirely overwhelmed. But God lifted me up. After a while I realized I didn't have much control over what happened in some of the situations so worrying about them was pointless and whatever God wanted to be done was going to be done. It's hardest when we don't have control to want control more than ever. But we were never in control of the situation to begin with so why not give control to God?

Chris' prayer: Jars of Clay's "Boy on a String"

The marionette has your number

There are many times in my life where I feel like a boy on a string.

Sometimes, even though I know I shouldn't, even though I don't want to, I still choose a sinful path. It is like there is no other path. Whether that sin be lying to a family member, killing a friend through the use of words or actions, or lusting after some picture in a movie or on the internet, I sometimes feel like I'm outside my own body, watching it sin, watching myself be lead astray even though I know better.

There are other times where I find myself doing good despite not choosing to. The most prominent example here is when I'm able to step outside my comfort zone with my youth ministry program, either in welcoming a teen, making a fool out of myself for some skit, or leading in something I don't particularly find myself good at. Even though I may not always want to, I still find myself doing these things.

Even though it may not always feel like it, in a way I'm the one in control of the strings. I choose who gets to pull them. Is God pulling my strings today? Or is the devil? Who have you trusted to pull yours?

Megan's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Boy on a String"

You can't feel anything
You're a boy on a string

I'm having a hard time trying to figure out if this is a good or a bad thing.

On one hand, if God is the puppeteer, guiding my every action, maybe I don't feel anything because God makes all the decisions, and doesn't take me anywhere where I would feel hurt.

But what about love? If I can't feel anything, then I obviously can't feel love. If I'm just a "boy on a string," I'm not being able to make my own decisions. I wouldn't feel joy or happiness. I would basically be lifeless.

Maybe it is good to feel, even if those feelings are of hurt or pain. At least then we are able to tell we are alive. And if we can feel hurt, then surely we will be able to feel love. And that, I think, is the greatest feeling of all.

Catie's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Boy on a String"

And youre just wasting time

I feel like I've been doing this a lot lately. Not so much wasting time in not getting things done, more like what am I doing with the time that I've been given. I feel like if every moment, every minute, every second is a gift from God, then I'm not spending the time I've been given very wisely. I need to make every moment that God has given me count, and not take any of them for granted. I'm not sure how to do go about that quite yet, but I'll get there in time.