Megan's prayer: Pillar's "Let It Out"

A while ago I was talking with a friend, and he told me it was okay to be mad at God. Although God already knows all my feelings, I had never really thought about getting mad, or yelling at him, during my time of prayer. Growing up, I always went to God with prayers of thanksgiving or prayers for those in need. I never fathomed bringing my anger to God.

But it makes so much sense now. Who else better to bring my frustration to than God? Whether it’s frustration with my family or friends, or even frustration with God and my faith, I think he will be able to handle it. He is the perfect listener. He won’t get angry at the words I say, because deep down He knows that I love him, and at the end of the day, that is what matters.

Even during the darkest hours, even during times that I feel like I don’t want to talk to God, I feel like he will be saying…

Let it out. Don’t hold back now.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Pillar's "Let it Out"

I don't know if we ever really learned to pray

Prayer is something that I'm not really sure you can exactly teach. The elements of praying are easy - Praise, Reconciliation, Asking, and Yes [saying yes to God's answer]. But how will any of us ever know if we are praying "right"? Is there even such a thing? We can never know the answers that God planned for us until they happen and we will rarely know how strong of an impact they have on our lives. For instance, what if we didn't get something we prayed for but got something better? A lot of times, I feel like I am praying wrong. I'm honestly not even sure what I measure it against. I guess I measure it at my own worth...what would make my prayers something that God would want to listen to? What makes them sincere? Are they even? But God does want to hear us, because He cares. I so often and so easily leave out that detail. My prayer is to pray...not right or wrong...just pray. I think this song is onto something. The best praying is just letting it out.

Chris' prayer: Pillar's "Let it Out"

Can You hear me cry?

The last time I cried, or at least the last time I remember really shedding some tears, was about a year ago. I was in the midst of one of the darkest times in my spiritual journey. For the life of me, I could just not find the words to pray. When I tried using others' words, including the songs we sung at Mass, they just felt hollow and shallow and forced. It really sucked not to be able to have real conversation with my Maker. It felt like it was never going to end.

So I wasn't expecting much out of the Adoration experience on the Spring Retreat with my church's youth ministry program. I figured it would be just like the rest of my prayer life. As I sang the songs like I always do, thinking about how much it hurt not to be able to speak, and a tear rolled down my cheek. A few seconds later, another one. And suddenly I was bawling.

I found that my tears, my crying, pushed me to sing even louder and with more heart, and when Carrie, our music minister, ended one song, I just kept on singing, making up the words as I went along, mixing familiar lyrics with original ones. I began to cry even harder, feeling the blessing that was being poured out on me in that chapel as I was connecting with God for the first time in months. Tears of immense sadness and despair slowly became tears of hope and mercy, and then tears of joy and thanksgiving.

Sometimes, when nothing else in the world is able to fix our problems, all it takes is a good cry.


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Marie's Prayer: Pillar's "Let it Out"

And I cry out, "Can You help me, please?"

I hate asking for help. I feel vulnerable and Helpless and I Absolutely hate it. What I need to realize is That I can't do it All on my own. So, for once, I will cry out For God's help, not because I'm desperate, but because God can and will Help me when I ask for it. Instead of trying everything else first And waiting to Ask God until I'm out of options, I will Call upon God first. Because if He can't help Me, no one can.

Catie's prayer: Pillar's "Let it Out"

Let it out, can You hear me?
Can You hear me cry?
Let it out, don't hold back, all this I got inside?

I've felt like this a lot since last night. I talked to my dad last night to find out that my grandma had probably had a mini stroke. I was a mess this morning trying to just offer it up, to let his will to be done. I talked to my mom later in the morning to find out that my grandma was fine and so that calmed my restlessness. I talked to my dad again a few minutes ago to find out my grandma had had a stroke today. She's stablized, she lives in a nursing home and they are not taking her to the hospital but she is okay but not doing great. I always thought I was good about trusting in God, but I've realized today that I'm not as good at it as I thought I was. I know that God's will will happen either way so it would just be easier to submit to God's will and trust that what is meant to happen will, but it is so much harder than it sounds. Giving up control is easier said than done.

So, when I cry out, are You listening?
I know You can hear me, I know You can hear me
You're my Comfort, can You hear me?
I know You can hear me, You're my Comfort

I know that God hears my prayers. I know that God heals, and that he is taking care of all of us. He wants us to want his will for our lives. God help me to accept your will this day and every day.

Chris' prayer: Delirious?'s "Gravity"

I'm caught in the middle which way should I go?

This is the question I find myself asking, specifically with regards to the ministry I'm involved in. I'm stuck between investing myself fully into something familiar and constant and supported, or finding a way to lay down my own tracks and try something new, something without any guarantee whatsoever that it won't be a colossal failure. I've been praying and contemplating for awhile, and much like the rest of this song, I really can't make sense of what I'm hearing. I really need a clear "this is what you should do, and here's how I'll help you accomplish that," but I haven't heard that, yet.

Fortunately, there's another song, and more prayer time, tomorrow.


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Megan's prayer: Delirious?'s "Gravity"

People have told me that college will be the best four years of my life. I've often wondered just exactly what part of college makes it the "best years." Although I am enjoying the experience, I really hope that these aren't the best years of my life. I hope that after I graduate, I will have as much joy in my life, if not more, as I do now.

One of the last lines of today's song states

These are the days that we'll look back upon when we're old

I hope that when I do have a chance to look back and reminisce about these four years, that I will be pleased with how they turned out. Their greatness will surely not be measured by whether or not I got drunk or how many classes I skipped. Those things are so trivial in the grand scheme of things. What matters is whether or not I let God's love for others be seen through me. That is where my focus should be. That is what will make these four years great.

Marie's Prayer: Delirious?'s "Gravity"

Memories fade while experience beckons
I'm caught in the middle which way should I go

I hate Making choices. If someone comes up to me and says, "Pick which One you'd like to do," I will refuse to pick. I tend to get stuck in the Middle and don't know which way to choose. This proves difficult when I have To come up with a Solution for one of my characters when I write. But I tend to try and stick towards the memories Opposed to the experience because even though I know Experience is good, I always look at what could go wrong. So now I have to take The giant leap into experience. One, two, three, Here I go!

Erinnicole's Prayer: Delirious?'s "Gravity"

Gravity's pulling me, but heaven is calling me

this is how I have been feeling lately - the the world (gravity) is all pulling me one way and that God (heaven) is pulling the other. I feel like nothing can be simple because it feels, in my melodramatic teenage mind, that life is the way of the world or the way of God. But the way of God can become the way of the world, if we call upon God's help. Or at least, it can successfully become the way of the world we create for ourselves. That is how I want to live my life. Sometimes, though, I feel weak and I don't feel like constantly preaching on why certain things are bad. I'd rather let the little stuff go - like harmless insults. It is much easier to blow them off and keep my friends than it is to stand up and potentially lose them or a part of them. Granted, no one said that easy would be right. My prayer is that I will aquire the strength to pull away from what the world seems to be pulling me to. Also that I can recognize more simply the ones whom God has given me that are headed in the same direction that I am.

Catie's prayer: Delirious?'s "Gravity"

Give me the real thing flowing through my veins
This is the day, this is the hour
Show me the truth cos I want to be blinded
I wanna run, which way should I go

This is what I want. I want the real thing flowing through my veins. I want to truly live out all that I have been taught about how I should live my life in Christ. I think Lent is the perfect time for that. In all honesty, the last couple days I have gotten really pumped about Lent, I'm so excited about it. I'm so glad that it has finally started. I don't really know why I'm so excited about it, but whatever reason, this year I am. I think part of it is that Lent is just a great way to grow deeper in relationship with God and to really focus on how much He truly loves each of us.

heaven is calling me

Heaven is calling each of us. How do we answer heavens call? By knowing that when we are truly doing something right, even if it feels as though the entire world is against us, knowing that we have an entire communion of angels and saints with the Trinity up in heaven cheering us on, wanting us to do the right thing which is the cheer we should be listening to, not the earth's. Whose cheer to we chose to listen to today?

Megan's prayer: Jump5's "Wonderful"

I find that a lot of my focus in my faith life right now is about God's love for me. I'm currently reading the book If God is Love by Philip Gulley and James Mulholland. Many of the songs I have encountered during prayanewsong have dealt with God's perfect love for me. I talked with a friend recently about the different ways that we both feel God's love in our life.

Today's song gave me a chance to reflect on my love for God. The song simply states all of the jumbled thoughts floating around in my head.

I'll never have the words enough to tell you how I feel.

I have a hard time putting my love for God into words. Sometimes it comes out through the songs I sing at Mass, but those aren't my original words. I'm just hoping my love is being able to be seen through those words I am singing.

More than just the singing, I hope that I am able to show my love for God through my actions. I try hard to be kind to others, help those in need, and share the talents God has given me with others.

I hope the saying is true that "Actions speak louder than words."

Chris' prayer: Jump5's "Wonderful"

[E]verything about you speaks to me

I wish there were a way to know this were true, Lord. Or, more accurately, I wish it were easier to know exactly what those words are, because many times it is hard for me to tell. Sometimes, I feel like the words you have placed upon my heart lead me in a different direction than I was taught as a kid. And when I try to explore those directions, to see if it is really You speaking to me, revealing something about Yourself to me, I'm met with opposition. What are You saying, Lord? What are You telling me? And how do I know it is You?


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Marie's Prayer: Jump5's "Wonderful"

I'll never have the words enough to tell you how I feel

I could type for hours And hours explaining how this lyric applies to My life. But if I did, it would Negate what the words are Saying.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Jump5's "Wonderful"

when they see what you mean to me, then they will know

It is my dream to have Jesus shine through me in this way. I want God to use me to show others how great His love is. IT would be such an honor for someone to look at me and see God and recognize that there is a true something there. The love of God far surpasses the love of humanity. So much so, in fact, that I have trouble putting it into words. But if I could just show it with my actions - then how powerful those actions would be!! If I showed God's love and acceptance, nothing could keep me down and everyone would know without question that they are loved. That would be the most beautiful reality.

Catie's prayer: Jump5's "Wonderful"

I'll never have the words enough to tell you how I feel

There have been many a times in my life when I felt like this. When I'm either don't have the words because I'm struggling with prayer or when I am in such awe of God that I can't put into words the amazingness that is God. God is so incredibly wonderful that it can be hard to put it into words. Everything about Him is way betterthan we could ever imagine. Lord, give me the words, so I can bring honor due your name.

Megan's prayer: Casting Crow's "Life of Praise"

Growing up, I often found that there were discrepancies between what someone actually said to me and what I thought they said to me. It most of the time happened when someone would use a common phrase I was unfamiliar with. The saying “day and age” to me was “dayen age.” I didn’t know what “dayen” meant, but to me it made sense. The phrase “rhyme or reason” to me was “Reimer reason.” I knew someone with the last name of Reimer growing up, and that’s just how I always heard the phrase when people would use it.

In today’s song, it used phrases that I am not extremely familiar with. I may have heard them before, but never quite understood what they meant. God of the Nations, Lion of Judah, Rock of the Ages, Alpha, Omega. I understand they describe God, but some of the meaning, some of the comparison, is lost for me. I may not get as much out of these phrases as someone else would.

One line of comparison, a way of describing God that I did understand today was For You are awesome. “Awesome.” It’s a word I use everyday to describe wonderful, amazing things. It is a word that I associate joy with, I use it to describe happy times. It is simple. It is a perfect. There is no Reimer reason in this dayen age that I couldn’t use more sophisticated phrases or words, but I think I will stick with “awesome” to describe God.

Chris' prayer: Casting Crowns' "Life of Praise"

I sometimes find it easy to fall into the trap of, as Janet Jackson sang, "what have you done for me lately?" when it comes to the way I act toward people. If someone has been nice to me, or done something for me, or simply been easy to like, I find it easy to be kind to him or her, to do something for him or her, to simply like him or her. I forget that that person, as a human being, has worth, regardless of how they treat me. And not just worth, but immense worth.

That is what is sung of in the first verse of this song- God's immense worth just for being God. He is not worthy of my praise simply because of what He has done for me and not just for the change He's made in me. He is worthy of my praise simply because of who He is.

The challenge in this song is to live a life of praise, and living a life of praise means recognizing that our creator dwells within each of us. It means valuing each individual we encounter because they hold intrinsic value, and not just because of the worth we place on, or withhold from, them. That is what praising God with one's life is all about.


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Marie's Prayer: Casting Crown's "Life of Praise"

Not just for the change You've made in me

This sentence really Interests me. I tend To be One of those people who Look at God as someone who changes You and is there when You need Something big to happen. But He's there even in the Silence. He's there when you Do the same thing you do Every other night of the year. It's not Just about change. Truth be told, I am Not a big fan of Change. Like most, I fear the Great unknown. Even though I have changed So much, even in this past year, I have to realize that God is there in the Sameness that is everyday Life.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Casting Crown's "Life of Praise"

Not just for the things You've done for me

there is an old country song that says something along the lines of "some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers". When I was younger, I would pray for foolish things I wanted (I still do of course, but my mom's mantra has changed) and my mom would always repeat this line to me when I would be upset that I didn't get it. There was a specific time that I was losing a friend to a different group and I prayed that we could repair what we had but that didn't happen. At the time, I didn't understand why. I can see now that I probably would've missed out on a lot of other friendships had she and I remained clung to one another in high school. It isn't that I dislike her or anything of the sort, but while I'm not happy we aren't friends anymore, I'm not unhappy either. That seems to happen a lot - the act of being blinded by what I want and not remembering that God has a plan. I am really good at saying 'thank you', and each day I repeatedly thank God for all that He has done for me. I have never even considered saying thank you for what He may have prevented. I pray to always be conscious of the fact that God has a plan bigger than I can both imagine and see.

Catie's prayer: Casting Crowns' "Life of Praise"

I'll live a life of praise

I've more or less been thinking of this idea a lot lately. How do I live my life entirely for God? How do I live a life of praise, a life that praises God alone? I'm not entirely sure I've figured it out. As I might have posted recently, I have been thinking a lot of God's great, amazing, unconditional love. When thinking and knowing of how much God loves us, no strings attached, even on our not so good days, how can we not live a life that praises him alone?

Chris' prayer: Michael W. Smith's "I Will Be Your Friend"

But all these moments unite us

Just over a year ago, I sent out emails to around 50 different people, offering them the opportunity to accomplish one of my life's dreams with me. That dream: a multi-day whitewater rafting trip. The experience was one that I was prepared to complete alone, and actually one that I expected to do alone, but three of my friends accepted the invitation, accepted the challenge, and joined me for a five-day trip down the Arkansas River in Colorado.

It was an extremely important event for me personally, as it was one that I had wanted to do for a very long time. But more memorable than actually accomplishing the goal of paddling through Class 5 rapids, what I enjoyed most was having a group of people to share that experience with. Those who went with me I wouldn't say are the three closest people to me in the world, but we now have something that we will always share, something that will forever connect us.

Moments really do unite us.

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Megan's prayer: Michael W. Smith's "I Will Be Your Friend"

I'll be your friend for a lifetime

For me, a "lifetime" so far has only been 20 years. And in these 20 years, my group of friends has changed drastically. I no longer talk much with my "best friends" from grade school. Even during just 4 years at high school, my groups of friends changed multiple times.

While I still love each of my friends, all of the current ones, and the past ones, none of them have been there for my lifetime. Jesus has been there for me, though. He has been there when friends change. He has been there during the hard times, and especially during the good times. I can rely on him. I can trust him. He is an amazing friend.

Marie's Prayer: Michael W. Smith's "I Will Be Your Friend"

I'm saying I will be your friend

Saying doesn't always mean doing. No matter what you say, or how much you promise, words are only words. If you put meaning to these words and actually act like a friend, that's what counts. You can't just be a friend in name, that doesn't work. Also, friendships shouldn't just be convenient to you. A true friend is someone who will stop whatever they're doing to help you when you really need it. A true friend knows you're sad even if you say everything's alright. That's what I want to be. I don't want to be a friend in name, I want to be a friend in truth. And who better to look up to than God? He's the Ultimate Friend, He leads by example and hopes that one day the world will catch on. So I'm taking the hint and will never just say that I'm a friend.

Catie's prayer: Michael W. Smith's "I Will Be Your Friend"

Wont walk away in the hard times
I will be your friend

This is probably one of my favorite things about God. He isn't going to leave when the going gets tough. He is going to be there in your storm, helping throughout it. While storms are sometimes the test of how close a relationship really is, that is not the case with God. While other friends might leave when it's hard, leave when it's just not fun and games anymore, God doesn't. God is with us and carries us through our hard times however it is up to us to recognize that.

Chris' prayer: Kutless' "Let You In"

Do I offer my love freely? Or does it come with strings attached?

I would like to believe that I do offer love freely, but if I'm being truly honest, I don't offer it freely to everyone. Some people are very easy to love, and those people are the ones that I find myself loving without limits or conditions or excuses. There are other people, though, that I find harder to love, and the love I show them either comes with conditions, or isn't nearly the same love that I offer freely to others.

My God, however, offers the same love to me that he offers to everyone else, no matter how easy or hard I am to love. It is a love without conditions, without end, without limits. It is a perfect and purifying love. And it is one that I need to do a better job of sharing with those I find most difficult.


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Megan's prayer: Kutless' "Let You In"

For me, realizing and accepting God's love can sometimes be a challenge. I don't feel worthy, or I don't understand why he choose me.

In my mind, I'm still fighting to understand

Maybe it sometimes doesn't seem real to me, or I don't think that I should be the one he choose, but what I think ends up not mattering. The fact of the matter is that he did choose me to love. As scary and powerful and awesome that is, it is just something I'm going to have to get used to.

Marie's Prayer: Kutless' "Let You In"

In my mind, I'm still fighting to understand

Okay, so I may not Have told you all this, but earlier in The year there was a point Where I thought I might Have cancer. Even now, months later, my mind is still fighting To understand that I'm okay. I have this fear that One day I'll get a call and have cancer. I know This is crazy, but it keeps happening. I keep feeling Like something big and Life changing is about to happen. I can't understand that I'm actually Fine. And it's scary, no joke. I'm scared that There's something wrong with me. But there's not. So I pray every night that God gives me the understanding I need.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Kutless' "Let You In"

I tried to place it all upon my back again
But this crushing weight was well beneath the skin
Panicking for the light, an inner struggle I fight
But then I realized that You could be the only way

This stanza is me in a nutshell. I am constantly trying to take things upon myself. It is truly exhausting and the weight truly does crush me sometimes trying to take so many things on. It is everything physical, like pushing myself too hard to be too involved, and things that are emotional, like trying to please everyone. I am constantly fighting to understand. And I have realized that God is the only way to accomplish anything. Because in God, all things are possible. But the next line of the stanza, the one that doesn't exist here, is that I may have realized it, but I haven't accepted it. I have the big problem with giving over my power. My prayer is to be able to 'finish the stanza' in my life and not just realize that I can trust God, but actually do it.

Catie's prayer: Kutless' "Let You In"

for my sins Your abused

I have never thought about my sins that way before. I know Christ died to save us from our sins, but just something about the way this is said really hits me. If we were to think of abusing Christ each time before we made the choice of sin, we would sin a whole lot less. With that thought on our mind how could we not?

My heart it screams, to open up and let You in

This is why once one starts going deeper into their faith, they cannot just stop going deeper if their faith means something to them. This is because once one has Christ, the longing for him just continues to grow. Our hearts yearn for that love, that intimacy with God for there is nothing on earth that is more beautiful.

Erinnicole's Prayer: La Rue's "Waiting Room"

Losing my mind

This feeling is one I am all too acquainted with. I actually have taken to saying it regularly over the past few weeks. It seems like nothing in my life is staying consistent. People can't decide if they want to be friends, work schedules and theatre schedules change, people expect a lot from me, or they expect nothing at all. And the inconsistency is driving me nuts. So this song fits so perfectly into my life (unlike so much else right now, ironically haha). I do have to start remembering that this isn't it. It gets so much better than this. Even during the times when things are working, there is still the unimaginably better on the other side of this world. The place where God is waiting for me and here I am waiting for Him. But one day the waiting will be over...and I trust in God know that all this waiting will be worth it. Amen.

Megan's prayer: LaRue's "Waiting Room"

I wish God would send me daily emails. Just a quick “Hey Megan, It’s God. Don’t forget I love you. Have a good day at school.” That would be the most fantastic thing to find in the morning when I’m barely awake, stumbling to my computer to check to see if I have any new emails. I would save every email, label it “GOD,” and go back through each of them during the times that I’m not feeling loved, during the times I need a quick reminder.

Day after day…
…I have to remind myself
That you’re there and I belong to you

I don’t really understand why I have to be reminded so often. Looking at my life, it is evident that I am God’s and that He loves me. It is obvious that I have been blessed, but sometimes I lose focus of this. I need that gentle reminder, either from myself or a friend, that I truly am loved by God. It helps me to regain focus on what is important in my life. It helps to reprioritize the things that I do. It helps me to live a happy life, to live my life for God.

Chris' prayer: LaRue's "Waiting Room"

Again, today, I'm presented with an image that doesn't appear too appealing upon first glance: a waiting room. The first place my mind goes when thinking of a waiting room is to the doctor's office. Sitting there, feeling terrible, waiting for my name to be called, so that I can go and sit and wait in an even smaller room.

However, God reminds me through Philip and Natalie LaRue's voices that He is even in these spaces. He reminds me of something I'm always looking to hear whether I'm at the doctor's office, sitting at home, or anywhere else:

Everything will be alright
And everything will be OK …
He loves me

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Marie's Prayer: LaRue's "Waiting Room"

Oh, everything will be alright
And everything will be OK

I try to believe With all my heart that one day Everything will be ok. Because If you don't believe that things Have the possibility of Looking up, then you are not Going to enjoy anything. And for that matter, If you don't believe God can make everything Ok, then you really have No hope in anything, which is truly sad. So I look on the bright side. Or at least I try to because, everything will work out Like it's supposed to.

Catie's prayer: LaRue's "Waiting Room"

And I don't understand how
We could be so blind not to see
The love that stands in front of
In front of you and me

Lately when I pray, I try to remind myself how much God loves me. As I've grown deeper in my faith it has become easier and easier for me to believe in the great love God has for me. But there are times when I fail to see it, fail to be Christ's love to others. How can we expect others to believe in God's great love for them if we aren't willing to be the one's to show it to them.

Chris' prayer: Falling Up's "Divinity"

And wait, wait for peace

I love this line. I love it because it seems to me like it is a contradiction. Usually, we spend our lives, or at least I spend my life, waiting for something to happen. I was at the Blues game the other night, and I could feel the momentum shift in the Blues' favor. They were working hard, battling for every puck, getting some good chances. I was on the edge of my seat, the anticipation rising within me. Something was going to happen. I could feel it.

And then, it did. A Blue picked up a rebound, waited just a moment for a clear shot, and then buried it in the open net. The crowd went crazy. I jumped out of my seat and celebrated the event unfolding before me. I turned and high-fived my friends beside and behind me. Everyone screamed.

In this line, though, it feels like God is calling me to wait for the exact opposite. No explosion. No celebration. No screaming and yelling and high-fiving. Just wait. And when the waiting is over, rest. Be at peace. It sure doesn't seem nearly as exciting, but perhaps it is just what I need- some peace in my life.


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Megan's prayer: Falling Up's "Divinity"

As I sat in adoration tonight, I couldn't focus. My mind wandered, thinking about 15 million different things all at the same time. Thinking about the homework waiting for me tonight, wondering if I was prepared for the Core team meeting, trying to figure out why I was having such a hard time focusing, etc. It was so frustrating because Holy Hour is my time during the week that I have to slow down, catch my breath, and talk to God, but tonight I wasn't able to find that peace, that time to just rest in the presence of God.

My heart, it hurts
'Cause it never catches its breath

One restless Holy Hour wouldn't seem like a big deal, but I feel like this restlessness has become a pattern in my Holy Hours, and in my life. Even during the times where I stop "doing," my mind still races, focusing on so many other things. I wake up during the night, with my mind making to-do lists for the next day.

I wish I could stop this, just for a while, and regroup. Have a chance to just "be" with Jesus, and not thinking about anything else. My heart needs this time to heal, to gain strength again. I long for this stillness, this peacefulness.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Falling Up's "Divinity"

This time it means something
Dreams will fall, love will spill

This seems to be something that I am constantly telling myself. "This time it will mean something". When it comes to relationships with people, this tends to be my mantra. I find that in my own journey to find myself, I sometimes lose others. Sometimes it is a good thing in the end, and sometimes it is not. But regardless of what I can see in the big after picture, at the time it hurts a lot. So I tell myself in new relationships "This time it will mean something." I was thinking about the Eucharist last night and about this problem I have with having myself be loved by me and my peers at the same time. I was trying to think of one consistent friend that I've had throughout high school. And I could only come up with one. Jesus. He could see me through all of the changes I made in myself, trying desperately to figure out who I am. He knew the whole time that I am just supposed to be Erinnicole and listen to Him. Unlike my other friends, I truly know that this time it means something. Present tense. Dreams of the perfect relationship will undoubtedly fail me, but Jesus' love will never cease spilling over onto me.

Marie's Prayer: Falling Up's "Divinity"

And take, take your time
But move so fast

This really strikes Me. How many People will tell you To take your time When all they Really want is For you to do/be there now? I do it. I'd be lying If I said I didn't. That seems To be how people Are. They're all about That instant gratification. The Want for something to be done As fast as possible. But what people Don't understand is that sometimes things Take time. And maybe you ask God for something and The next day you don't get it. That doesn't mean God Didn't hear you, it may just mean that He's working on it. So let people take Time to accomplish things.

Catie's prayer: Falling Up's "Divinity"

My heart it hurts
Cause it never catches it's breath

I feel like this a lot. Not so much that my heart hurts, but more that it never has time to catch it's breath. I am constantly going throughout my day without much time to reflect on it. Many times I find myself telling people that I don't have time to live my life. And the sad part is is that it is true. I don't have time to enjoy what I'm doing because I'm too busy trying to do everything, get everything done.

And this is real

I forget that the only real thing I have is God, I forget that everything else will eventually be gone. God however is constant, not going anywhere, not going to leave me. If I took more time to slow down throughout my day and remember that, maybe my heart could finally catch it's breath.

Chris' prayer: Matt Maher's "Everything You've Done"

For Christmas, I painted my sister a picture. She knew that she would be getting a painting from me; it was what she had asked for, and she had purchased the supplies for me, but she left everything else up to me. I got to decide the color scheme, the subject, the title, everything. The result is what you see above.

I was a little worried about what Michelle would think of it, but when she opened it, I could see on her face that she really liked it. It was very visually pleasing to her eyes. But when I told her what it meant, when I told her the story behind it, how the painting signified home, and how each of the blocks of color represented a different room in our childhood home, and how our home will always be in our hearts, I could see that she loved it. It was very visually pleasing to her heart.

Today's song reminds me that that is what I have to look forward to. Seeing and hearing the story behind all the wonderful gifts that God has given me, realizing for the first time the extent to which He loves me via all of the tiniest details that he has placed into my life, the details that I was sure to miss, but still made my life what it is. Today, I naively celebrate all the things I can see that He has done for me. Someday, I will truly celebrate [His] love … and everything [He's] done.


iTunes

Megan's prayer: Matt Maher's "Everything You've Done"

Most weeks I have the joy of attending two masses at some point during the week. I always make it to the noon mass at Cletus, where there is singing and dancing, and I am surrounded by teens, and the mass is full of energy. I also normally have the chance to attend a weekday mass in the chapel on campus. These Thursday afternoon masses are much more reverent, without any music, without much energy. Different, but still wonderful.

Today's song spoke to me about the joy that I feel during the Sunday masses at Cletus. I love getting the song sheet before mass starts and having a chance to see what songs we will be singing. I enjoy the songs the slow songs, the songs with feeling, the songs sang during times of reflection. Even more than that, I like the songs that give me the feeling that no matter what, I couldn't sing it loud enough. Songs that fill the whole church. The songs that I love the most are the songs that encourage dancing. Although that may sound hypocritical because I don't typically dance, I enjoy them more for the chance to see others dance, to see others express their faith in such a pure form of joy. The songs that are even able to get teenage boys to dance. While some may find this irreverent, all I can think during these times is "Jesus, we dance for you."

Marie's Prayer: Matt Maher's "Everything You've Done"

Celebrate everything you're doing

I don't celebrate myself enough. I realized this yesterday as I celebrated the successful start of my collaborative vlog. Actually, I don't think I've ever actually celebrated anything I've ever done. And that's kind of sad when you think about it. I've celebrated things others have done, but never me. So I'm going to try and do that more often. Because if I can't celebrate me, what can I celebrate? I need to learn to appreciate me because God made me in His image and I should celebrate that. Yay God!

Erinnicole's Prayer: Matt Maher's "Everything You've Done"

We dance for you!

this song made me want to dance...i haven't stopped "bopping" along since I clicked play! That is how i think life should be; it is just a great thing so why not dance?! sometimes we hit hard times, yes...but we still wake up in the morning. and that's reason enough for me to dance. i have little to no rhythm but that doesn't really take away from my love of dance. i wish that instead of blogging my love for God today, I could dance it! The words aren't coming so easily today but if you all could see me dancing, it would look something like this :

~* ~* ~* ~* ~* ~*~~* ~^^^^^ *~*~~**~*~* ~* ~* ~*~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~*~ LA LA LA LA ~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~**~ ^^^
with the "^"s indicating jumps

because when I get into my faith with my whole body, it's an overwhelming, passion-filled mess.

this point of this whole mess of emotion, is that I think we should use the love and joy that God fills us with to express our gratitude in the most vibrant way that we can which, today, happens to be dancing for me!

Dance for the Lord!

Catie's prayer: Matt Maher's "Everything You've Done"

Celebrate in joyful hope
Celebrate your love
Celebrate what you are doing,
And everything you've done

I met someone a few weeks ago who I really look up to. She is always so joyful, always has a positive attitude, always has a smile on her face and always ready to greet everyone she meets with a warm welcome. She is probably one of the nicest and most genuine people I have met thus far. The reason I look up to her so much is because she is able to celebrate, celebrate life, celebrate love, celebrate God in everything that she does. I want to be like that. I want that joy that God gives us to celebrate the good and the bad, the triumphs and the trials. It's easy to celebrate when things are going well, if one can celebrate and triumph in the midst of hardship though, that is the true test of character.

Chris' prayer: Andy Cloninger's "Ascribe to the Lord"

I'll be honest. I had to look up ascribe. It isn't a word that I hear every day, or, actually, every year, so I wanted to check and make sure I get the definition right. Ascribe means to attribute something to something or someone. Basically, today's prayer is calling me to give to God what is His.

What have I ascribed to Him today? What have I taken credit for? What have I withheld from Him? Where is He calling me to open myself up to Him?

These are questions that I really need to be asking myself everyday. I need to be more consistent about turning things over to God, giving Him all of my problems, my sin, my failures...and all of the successes that are attributed to me. For He is the reason I am successful, and He can carry all of my burdens.


iTunes

Megan's prayer: Andy Cloninger's "Ascribe to the Lord"

Ascribe to the Lord the glory due His name.

All glory is due His name. Not just some glory, not just the glory I don’t want to take… All glory. Sometimes this is hard to remember. Sometimes it is hard to not want to take all the glory. Sometimes it is hard to accept that fact that I didn’t do it on my own. God was always there helping me.

I find it to be a humbling challenge to constantly give glory where it is due. A challenge that I am excited to be part of. I want other’s to know that I don’t take credit for all of the amazing things about my life, all that credit is given to God. All of the glory is given to God.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Andy Cloninger's "Ascribe to the Lord"

the voice of the lord is a powerful thing

"a" powerful thing is quite the understatement...more like the powerful thing. What is more powerful than God or His words to us? I feel foolish that I am so accepting and know for certain that nothing is more powerful than God's voice, yet it is most likely the voice I listen to least. I think it's most likely due to the fact that while it is the most powerful and rewarding to listen to, it is almost the most difficult to hear at times. But this past week, I've been trying really hard. I know I need to continue making life changes and so I've been focusing extra on listening to His Words for guidance. Nothing earth shattering, but that isn't what I really need. I just need a small word here and there. That is enough, too, because it is the most powerful thing. Just think of what the world could be if we all harnessed the strength to hear and listen to it.

Marie's Prayer: Andy Colininger's "Ascribe to the Lord"

To redeem the lost

I have been lost so many Times that I have Lost count. Ha ha, yeah I know How weird that sounds. But no joke, Whether it be Lost in person Or lost in mind or Spirit, I can't keep track. How nice Would it be to one Of those Times Just have someone there to say,"oh yeah, go That Way,"? I would much appreciate that. I realize That God is there to do this, so Maybe I should Look To Him when I'm lost. And I will. I know that If I lose my way I can look To Him and He will save me.

Catie's prayer: Andy Cloninger's "Ascribe to the Lord"

The voice of the Lord is a powerful thing

Yesterday while in weight training, I got thinking about this camp called Totus Tuus. It's held within different diocese within the country and is run by young adults (I think mostly college students). They go to different parishes throughout the diocese that they work for working camp for kids 1st-12th grade. It's broken up between teaching, skits, games, all of that. It's something that has crossed my mind before but just kept going. But yesterday during weight training I'm like I should do that, I would absolutely love that. So I talked to some people about it and now I'm in the process of applying for it for the summer. In thinking about it last night, when God puts things on my heart that He knows I might be skeptical about, he puts it on my heart hard, throws it at me no real warning becasue He knows that's the only way He has a chance of me running with it. There can be no subtle clues that maybe I should do this- that doesn't work for me. I'll overthink it and then will end up probably not doing it. God's voice was loud and clear yesterday, although it isn't always. We all have to keep our eyes and ears open to the voice of God.

Chris' prayer: MercyMe's "In the Blink of an Eye"

And though I'm living a good life
Can my life be something great?

What are you scared of? Are you scared of spiders, or mice, or bugs? Are you scared of failing, of being alone, of the unknown? We all have certain things that scare us. While I might receive a small fright from an unexpected spider or mouse, I wouldn't say that I'm scared of them. And while I'd rather not fail, or end up alone, I wouldn't say that I'm particularly scared of those, either.

My greatest fear, if I'm truly being honest with myself, is greatness. I'm not exactly sure why, but I'm sure that the fear is real. As a result, I tend to settle into things and get comfortable in my mediocrity. For instance, I've said countless times that I'm going to get my portfolio together and look for a new job, one I really feel I'm ready for. But I don't take the steps to achieve that goal. I'm far too comfortable with how things are. I am crippled by this fear of what I could achieve if I put my mind to it, if I invested myself fully, if I just trusted God!

And I know it. I know that I could be great. Not just with work, but with everything that I do. I could be so much more. But instead of doing it, I'm stuck asking...

What am I waiting for?

YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Megan's prayer: MercyMe's "In the Blink of an Eye"

Dane Cook is a silly guy. I love listening to his routines or watching youtube clips of him. Part of today’s song stood out and reminded me of one of his routines, and actually got me thinking.

Dane Cook talks about how he wants to leave behind a legacy. One way that he is going to do this is by shoving ice cream in a little kid’s face. The child will probably remember that for a long time, and Dane Cook will have successfully left behind a legacy. An odd one, but a legacy nonetheless.

I also would like to leave behind a legacy. I don’t want it to be a bad memory, but rather a great memory. I want to make a difference in someone’s life… in many people’s lives. I think that is one reason I’m getting a degree in education. I want to do everything that I can to help children meet and exceed their full potential. I want them to have the chance to leave behind a legacy.

I didn’t know if teaching would be a good enough way to leave a legacy, but today’s song reassured me.

If I give the very best of me
That becomes my legacy

Erinnicole's Prayer: MercyMe's "In The Blink of an Eye"

There's a reason I'm alive for a blink of an eye

Today we had a chastity talk at school, given by Mr. Jason Everett (probably spelled incorrectly...my apologies). It was incredible and I saw hearts change. A guy in my class, who I am relatively friends with was wearing a disrespectful shirt proclaiming profanity and when the talk was over, he approached the speaker and took it off and handed it to him. It was an intense hour that brought up an unbelievable amount of viewpoints for things I've never thought of. I made the choice to live chastity already when I was in 8th grade officially, but even when I was young I would look in the mirror and know that I was special and worth the world. Still, his talk hit me and reinforced that I'm making the right decision.

Before the talk, I doubted that it would have an extreme impact. No matter how good the delivery is, it is difficult to talk about God and His love, even in my school, and a lot of people close their minds and tend to shut down. So my thought was, the majority of us have made the choice we will make. Most likely, he will spark the desire for a new lifestyle in maybe a few people and if some kids already have that desire but don't know where to start, he can help keep their ball rolling. But that isn't what happened; people talked about it all day and I heart guys saying to their girlfriends "that really inspired me". It was awesome! At lunch, I talked to my friend about my previous thoughts on how much of a difference a stranger, no matter how cool, could truly make but that I was wrong. And he said, 'erin...you give chastity talks...how can you not think that they make a difference?'

well, that sort of got me thinking and we actually were having this conversation as this song was playing in the background for the first time when I clicked it. And it occurs to me, that I don't think I can make a huge difference. I can offer good points and give a few laughs (in life, not just in talks), but since the lifestyle choice is ultimately other people's, how much of a difference can I really make in the world? It makes complete sense to me. Perhaps it is the stubborn attitude of the teenage years [I wouldn't know yet, I haven't muddled through them all], but to me, whenever I give advice, no matter how badly the person wants it, they almost never listen.

I stopped texting my friend and really focused on the song and the other words, while beautiful, faded away, just leaving "There's a reason I'm alive for a blink of an eye". It hit me, much like the talk today but more and in a different way. Even if life is truly just a blink of God's eye, virtually no time at all...He still placed me here. And if He took the time to create me as I am, and as He wants me, there must be a reason I am here. There has to be! So even if it isn't a big difference, I am affecting the world around me...or there wouldn't be a world around me. I believe everything happens for a reason and so it only makes sense that there is a reason I'm alive for a blink of an eye.

Catie's prayer: MercyMe's "In the Blink of an Eye"

You put me here for a reason
You have a mission for me

I heard somewhere recently about how when God created us, he created each person in their own little mold (figuratively speaking of course) and once we had been created, he broke that mold. There's no one on earth that has the exact same mission on earth that I have, you have- each person has their own. Are we living out that mission? How well are we living out God's will for our lives. I know for me I can always do better at that. One thing I've especially been working on lately is taking the time to stop and actually listen when somene is talking to me. Christ is in every single person and in that moment that is the Christ in me having a chace to encounter the Christ in them. We shouldn't miss out on that opportunity to encounter Christ in those around us or show Christ to those around us becasue something else is seemlingly more important. Christ didn't ask people to take a raincheck. He didn't say to come back at a time that was more convenient for him. He loved people where they were at, even it was with him when he could have been doing something else. And we should do that too. There is not better way to
embrace that moment that we've been given.

Chris' prayer: Mary Mary's "Shackles (Praise You)"

Take the shackles off my feet so I can dance
I just wanna praise you

This song, and specifically these lines, describe perfectly my last adoration experience. I wanted to praise God, to sing to Him and worship Him, but I felt bound by my thoughts, my wandering mind, and never really did get to do what I was so looking forward to doing. I felt so handicapped by my own brain, my heart aching to cry out to my Maker, locked up. I just kept waiting for those next lines to come:

You broke the chains now I can lift my hands
And I'm gonna praise you

I'm still waiting...


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Megan's prayer: Mary Mary's "Shackles (Praise You)"

But I need you to lift this load
Cause I can't take it anymore

Sometimes the load does get heavy. Sometimes I feel like it is too much to handle, but at the same time, I end up feeling that it is too insignificant to take it to others, to take it to God. It *should* be something that I can handle myself.

It's hard to do, but many times it is necessary to just let go and let God take care of it. To finally realize that this load is not my load to carry. It's hard to do, but each time I am able to do it, I am left with such a sense of peace, and I wonder why I didn't just take it to God from the beginning.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Mary-Mary's "Shackles: Praise You"

Take the shackles off my feet so I can dance

How often do i ask God to take the "shackles" off of my feet so that I can start over running the wrong direction once more? I think the answer, sadly, is too often. The moment I am free from one problem, I let God go back to doing His thing and get right back to running the wrong way. But this is an excellent solution to that problem! When He takes the shackles off, praise Him! Dance! Thank God that we have the ability and the freedom to ask for His help in the first place and more so the fact that He openly gives it!

Catie's prayer: Mary Mary's "Shackles (Praise You)"

In the majority of this school year for bible study we have been talking about how we can make ourselves better women of God and just over all better people in general. We've been talking about this and how we can help the people around us become better people as well. My bible study leader gave us this quote last night, "Father, make of me a crisis man. Bring those I contact to decision. Let me not be a milepost on a single road; make me a fork, that men must turn one way or another on facing Christ in me. " This is saying that when people come to us, they are going to have to make a choice of whether or not to follow Christ because we are living out how he wants us to live that well. When we do this, as we ourselves grow into the people God want us to be and help the others around us as well, I think think that is no better way of saying to God-

I just wanna praise you

What better way to praise God than through our very lives, our very being. When we do God's will for us and live as he wants us to, there are few things that honor and praise him more.

Megan's prayer: Charlie Hall's "All We Need"

God I want You more
Than anything that glitters in this world

I struggle with this everyday. What my heart needs, and wants, is different than what my mind things I need sometimes.

This idea has been presented to me plenty of times - that I don't need material things to be happy. In fact, I have probably even been a advocate for this idea, and yet I find myself struggling with it.

How exactly do we break away from that feeling of needing materialistic things? How do I wrap my mind around the fact that God is all I need?

Just some questions I am wondering.

Chris' prayer: Charlie Hall's "All We Need"

I remember struggling through my financial accounting class in college. No matter how much time I spent on the homework, no matter how long we went over the homework in class, I just couldn't wrap my head around it. It simply didn't make sense to me. All semester long I struggled, keeping my grade afloat merely with completion and participation points, and doing "just well enough" on the tests and quizzes.

The class final was quickly approaching, and needless to say, I was quite nervous, as it would have a large effect on my grade. Shortly before the test, something miraculous happened. But repeating my assignments over and over again, the basic principles started to make sense. And once I got the basic principles down, the rest of it started to come to me, too. All this just a day or so before the test.

I ended up acing the final exam and walking out of the class with an A.

Today's song is similar to that experience for me. I am being reminded, over and over, one simple thing: that all I need is Him. And once I'm able to grasp that simple concept, I'll be able to experience my faith more fully, just as I was able to tackle the more difficult concepts in accounting once I accepted the simple ones.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Erinnicole's Prayer: Charlie Hall's "All We Need"

All we need is You

This is so true!! All we need to survive is simply God because what do we have, even as Earthly possessions, that God didn't give us anyway?? God is the source of all life, all happiness, all comfort, all joy. What more could we need? Even better, what more could we want? Isn't that why we own possessions at all? To make us happy or fill a gap that is there. But with God, there are no gaps. No empty spaces, nothing missing...because He is everything. He fills all spots that need to be and fills us with love and joy and everything we need and want. perhaps this was a little redundant but I am so filled with joy at realizing that all I will ever need...is something I already have. God, unlike so many things in the world, will never let me down. He is something I will always need and something I can always have. Should I choose to listen and accept Him. My prayer today is to do just that!

Marie's Prayer: Charlie Hall's "All We Need"

You can have all my hands can hold
My heart, mind, strength and soul

I am constantly trying to strengthen my mind, I read almost constantly. I recently finished an amazing novel by John Greene called Paper Towns. This book was funny, but also got me thinking about the way I see things. Anywho, I give up so much of my time widening the capacity of my brain by reading, but I should also start widening the capacity of my soul and heart by praying. I have trouble with this because I like being able to read off things or write them down myself, but praying for me is just saying what's on my mind. I find it hard to read or write down precisely what I want from prayer and that really bugs me. I need to just set time aside and talk, and then listen. I like listening because it is hard for me to voice my opinion. It is easier for me to listen, but I have to remember to ask to, for help when I really need it.

Catie's prayer: Charlie Hall's "All We Need"

We have all we need in You
And all we need is You
All we need is You

I love how this line repeats so many times in this song. Many times I try to go my own way, do my own thing, and forget that God's plan is so much better than anything I could ever think of. I forget that all I need is him, he knows the desires of my heart and what makes me happy and that if I follow his plan for my life my life will be that much better.

Chris' prayer: Tim Hughes' "Oh, Happy Day"

I think I'll always remember the first time I heard this song. It was at Encounter, a praise and worship/adoration session that I go to every month. It was so memorable because it was the culmination of such a wonderful, wonderful adoration experience. But what I remember most was how this song was prayed by a young woman seated near me.

It was clear that she already knew all the words to the song, and even knew some motions that, presumably, her youth group had learned. But what set her apart from all of the others doing the same motions and singing the same lyrics was the incredible authenticity with which she prayed. I could tell that, no matter how great my adoration experience had been, hers had easily been 10 times as powerful. The way she sang, the way she danced, the way she prayed exuded the lyrics that Hughes sings. She was experiencing endless joy, perfect peace, the ceasing of earthly pain, and she was celebrating, truly celebrating Jesus' presence in her life and in our world.

Every time I hear this song, I think of that young woman, and I try to match the enthusiasm and authenticity with which she prayed that night.


YouTube | iTunes | Lyrics

Megan's prayer: Tim Hughes' "Oh Happy Day"

I am Yours Jesus You are mine.

I absolutely love this line of the song. There is something so intimate, so personal.

The first part of the line is not "I am your friend" or "I am your follower" or "I am your servant".

The second part of the line is not "I am your savior" or "I am your king" or "I am your God".

I am Yours Jesus You are mine.

There are no descriptors. It's simple, it's easy, it's perfect.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Tim Hughes' "Oh Happy Day"

Forever I am changed

the word "changed" has always had a negative connotation in my life. especially this past weekend. ive had three people i care about tell me i have changed. it is hurting me but I'm not sure how to change "back". i don't want to move backward but i know that i definitely need to move forward. so while, unlike the song, it was most certainly not a happy day for me today (well it was until about an hour ago anyway) it does bring me some comfort and joy to know that Jesus can and will change me if i let Him...and He will change me for the better. which i need. and i definitely need forgiveness and it will be a magnificently happy day when i can be the person God intended me to be. i just need help to get there. and Jesus can give that. amen.

Marie's Prayer: Tim Hughes' "Oh Happy Day"

I'll never be the same

Thinking about this lyric reminds me of how many times I change my mind at the last minute and I never have the same opinion on the things I thought I was so sure of. Lately I have begun to wonder if I am Bipolar. I have reason too because my grandma's nephew is Bipolar and I have to admit I have wild mood swings. I don't usually have the same outlook on things one moment to the next and I am never the same. This really affects my spiritual life because one moment I can be "Alright, prayer! Yes!" and the next thing I know, I am doubting everything I believe. I have to realize that I probably will never be the same. And sometimes, that's okay.

Catie's prayer: Tim Hughes' "Oh Happy Day"

Oh happy day, happy day
I'll never be the same
Forever I am changed

Lately I've been trying to make a better effort about being in a good mood. I'm starting to make a conscious effort remembering throughout my day that God loves me and all those around me and also HOW MUCH he loves us. Christ thinks we are worth dying for. I think that's a good enough reason to be happy, to live our lives in a way that reflects that love. Everyday could be a happy day, it's all a matter of how we look at it.

Megan's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Dig"

While normally it is the lyrics of a song that move me and guide me in my prayer, today it was the melody of the song. It was beautifully peaceful and calming. It allowed me to relax.

Feel it coming in
Feel it going out

While breathing to the tune of this song, I just felt all the tension and worries disappear. Things melted away, which is exactly what I needed.

To be honest, I’m not sure that I understood the song. But at the same time, it fit perfectly with tonight.

Chris' prayer: Jars of Clay's "Dig"

So I begin again
Again, the healing bow

This is my faith, and has been since I really took ownership of it in high school. I've always considered myself to be a pretty religious person, even on my not-so-good days, but still, this line sums up what my faith has been through over the past 15 years. Starting over, time and time again, on my spiritual journey. I can't tell you how many times it has happened, how many times I've faltered. How many times I've sinned, and not just that, but chosen to sin.

But each and every time, my gracious Savior is there awaiting me, accepting my bow, my willingness to begin again, and He offers me healing. And hope. Hope that this time it will be different.


iTunes | Lyrics

Marie's Prayer: Jars of Clay's "Dig"

there was a time when i might have surrendered
but not now

I have made a decision about myself very recently. I have decided that I will stick to things even if people look at me funny for doing it. Or if the task becomes difficult, I will stick to it. I used to surrender so easily thinking that it was easier to be passive and not get into the middle of things. But now I realize how many things I've missed out on because I let others win or take control. The only person that can control my life besides me is God. No one can take my freedom from me and I have to speak up for myself. Just because people whisper or get upset doesn't mean I should miss out.

Catie's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Dig"

so i begin again

I feel like I begin again a lot with God. There are so many times when I'm like, I trust you completely, and then don't and then have to recommit myself to that trust, or to living for him alone, whatever. And I feel like I am constantly doing this. I often forget though, that that's exactly what God wants me to do.It's not that God wants me to fall away, it's that he wants me to know that I can begin again an endless number of times. He would rather me fall away 1000 times and come back to begin again over falling away and staying away. And who would want to stay away from such a perfect, wonderful God?

Megan's prayer: Falling Up's "Symmetry"

I typically take the “follow your heart” approach when it comes to making decisions. I let emotions, both my own and others, dictate my choices. Maybe this is good, maybe it’s bad. Sometimes what I think is right, what feels right to me, could be the wrong choice. I’m only human… I make mistakes.

But what if instead of listening to my own heart, and struggling with whether to follow that or my mind, I just followed God’s heart? I may not know what is always best for me or for others, but surely God would know. It’s scary to give up making my own decisions based on my own needs and trust God, but I want to try. I want to be moving to your heart this time.

Chris' prayer: Falling Up's "Symmetry"

Cause you know that your heart is so close to beating

Today, I had an stress echocardiogram. I've been having trouble catching my breath lately and my nurse practitioner wanted to "put me through the ringer," running all kinds of tests to find the problem as soon as they could. This was the last of the tests. It basically involves taking a video of my heart when I'm resting, making me exercise, and then taking another video right afterward.

And as I lay there before the exercise portion, I was watching my heart rate, as it sat in the 40s. I'm not sure if that's my resting heart rate, or if it was just depressed because I felt like I was going to faint. I couldn't help but remember the last time I'd seen a heart rate monitor with 40 on it. I snuck into room 206 in the ICU at St. Joseph's Hospital, and saw my dad lying there, sleeping. His heart rate was exactly 40. As I stood there fighting back the tears, I calculated in my head just how often 40 bpm is. My 40-something bpm might be good, but his definitely wasn't. His heart was dying.

I am so nervous to find out the results of all the tests. I want to find out that I'm mostly okay...that there is just a small thing wrong that can be easily fixed. I want to resume my normal life and be able to breathe. I just want to be normal.


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Erinnicole's Prayer: Falling Up's "Symmetry"

feel His voice

I was thinking today about how God communicates with me and how to explain it to others. I know with my whole heart that He speaks to me, but I cannot explain His voice. This song says it perfectly. His voice isn't something you hear, per say...it's something that you feel. It is the rush of peace that washes down on me when I am praying. It is the silence in my heart when I know He is working in my life. It is in the smiles and hugs of people that He gives me that truly care. I feel it in the breeze of each day and the darkness falling each night. It is wonderful to me that His voice is everywhere, the loudest of all things in my life...yet it isn't something I can hear and so easy to miss if I'm not "listening".

Marie's Prayer: Falling Up's "Symmetry"

When you complicate, you are left behind

I have a friend that is straight to the point. He hates when people aren't up front about things and hide their feelings. I find that when I say something, but mean something else, he doesn't catch on because he's so up front that he expects everyone to be that way. I like this because there's no hiding, no complication. When you complicate things, you leave the reality behind waiting to be uncovered. And it sometimes is never uncovered, left to rot in the hole that you buried it in. Then one day you realize that this hole is inside you and it's eating you up. Nothing is ever left behind when you really think about it. So when you choose to complicate things you might think you're leaving it behind, but you aren't. Everything you felt or did has some impact on your life no matter how small the situation seems, so don't complicate it. Be right to the point with what you feel, even if it's hard.

Catie's prayer: Falling Up's "Symmetry"

And we're moving to your heart this time
Release

It took me listening to the song a few times before I realized what was meant by "release". And after realizing what it means, I realized that it is the hardest part. To release our hearts to God. Whenever someone moves in on our hearts we have to make a choice. We have to decide whether we are going to let them in, let them know who we really are, be vulnerable with them, etc. Whether we recognize it or not, we do that with every single person we meet. God wants us to release our hearts to him. Not so he can play with it or break it, but so that he can hold it and care for it because he cares for us. Even when we are amists the storms of our life God is there, wanting to take our burdens from us, wanting us to release our hearts to him. All we have to do is be willing to release it.

Megan's prayer: Jump5's "Throw Your Hands Up"

Being the first Wednesday of the month, I was blessed to have the chance to attend Encounter this evening. As always, it was awesome to be in the presence of Jesus while listening and singing to some wonderful music, but I was struggling to stay focused. I was unable to produce any original prayers or thoughts... instead my mind was more focused on "Why can't I focus?" I watched others singing and praising, freely giving themselves to God, and wondered "Why can't I be at that stage?"

Maybe I should have listened more to what today's song was saying, and what Adam echoed right before the night started.

Doesn't matter what place you are in

It didn't matter if I was feeling a deep connection with God, or if my faith at that point seemed very shallow. It didn't matter if I had been to Encounter a couple dozen times, or if it was my first night. It didn't matter where I was in my faith life, all that mattered was that I had come to Encounter to share in that experience.

I didn't realize this until Encounter was over.

The next Encounter is 28 days away. Luckily, I don't have to wait that long to talk to God. I don't have to wait for Mass, or a Holy Hour, or anything of that sort. I am blessed that at any second of the day, I can call on God and I know He is there. No matter what place I am in.

Marie's Prayer: Jump5's "Throw Your Hands Up"

Never stop, we'll keep on moving

This world is a go, go, go place and we never stop moving. That is one of the things I want to work on, making time to just sit and think. Everything is fast pace and people want to move faster and before you know it, you've moved past someone that might mean a lot to you. I just don't want that person to be God. We should never be in such a hurry that we lose sight of the important things.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Jump5's "Throw Your Hands Up"

Then we're singing it all as one

I'm glad that I truly don't have to go at life alone. I could never do it. Whether it's just a few friends, or a whole support system, I rarely have to be alone if I don't want to be. I know that God is always there for me; I am talking about tangible people who can play with my hair when I am sad. and I love that this example is singing because I truly love singing and it is so powerful! It is a universal thing!

Chris' prayer: Jump5's "Throw Your Hands Up"

Do you know when the time has come?

This question is ubiquitous in Christian culture when referring to Christ's second coming. For example, the Left Behind book series has sold millions upon millions of copies telling the story of the last days of Earth, as Christ returns to rapture those who truly follow Him.

Behind the query above and behind the book series, is the underlying question, "Are you ready?" And while I can appreciate the sentiment behind the question and the idea of being ready for Christ's return, I can't help but always feel like answering the question negatively.

The way I view my spirituality, I try to live my life bringing Heaven to Earth, instead of living my life to get into Heaven, in any way that I can. It is a job that is never done. There is so much more that I can do to spread God's Love further, and deeper, to those around me. With God's Grace and strength, it will be something I continue to do until I die, regardless of whether or not I am raptured.


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Catie's prayer: Jump5's "Throw Your Hands Up"

There are few things that make my heart happier than singing praise and worship especially with other people. Whether it's just two of us in a car or 2000 people at a Steubenville Conference, I absolutely love it.

Can u hear it getting louder
The sound of noise increasing
A little piece of heaven now

For me, praise and worship is a little piece of heaven. When everyone is just there, praising God with all that they have, there is nothing more beautiful.

Megan's prayer: Salvador's "Shine"

During senior year of high school, I spent every study hall in the campus ministry office. They had wonderfully comfortable chairs and blankets in case I wanted to fall asleep. Most days I would just hang out, talk with my friend, listen to music, and act like we were doing homework. No one ever bothered us or came to check on us. It was fabulous.

I remember one day that was a little different. As we were minding our own business, Fr. Gahan sat down just to check to see how we were doing. I had known him for years through my home parish, but had never really sat down and talked with him.

That day, he was a man of few words. He had stopped to tell us "thank-you" for being leaders for our school. He then got more personal, and thanked us each individually for a specific thing we brought into the world.

He told my friend that she had a beautiful singing voice. She had recently sung at an all-school mass and surprised everyone because not many people knew that behind her shyness she had a powerful voice.

He then told me that every time he sees me I brighten his day just because I smile at him. Something that I never really thought consciously about doing was brightening his day. From that point on, I couldn't help but smile every time I saw him in the hall. In reality, I tend to smile at most everyone I pass.

Thank you, God, for allowing me to spread your love, to brighten people's day, through something as simple as a passing smile.

Marie's Prayer: Salvador's "Shine"

I’m not the man I was before

Everybody changes more than they can possibly imagine. I never thought that I'd have written a novel or be started on one that is basically my emotions on paper. I never thought of myself as a writer before highschool. I'm not the same person I was even last year. Life experience change people's views on a daily basis. Oddly enough, I wouldn't go back to who I was. Why would you want to undo anything, even bad things, when they have the possibility of making you a better person? Obviously those things happened for a reason. Even if I don't know the reason right now, I know that it was what God meant for me. I just have to remember this on days when I'm particularly down in the dumps, like when my depression acts up. Because if it's meant to be, it's going to happen according to God's will.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Salvador's "Shine"

Another day to celebrate!

This is exactly how I feel about God! This song is so beautiful and captures the feelings of my heart. I just want to praise God! Especially when it is good. I want to be able to show God through myself to others. I am so passionate about God and who He is to me and I so badly want to be able to let that shine through me. The King of Kings is alive in me?? How honoring! Of all of the people that God could use to exhibit His Wonder...He could easily choose people with power, people with influence on a big group as opposed to the few people I see each day; but instead He chooses to use anyone who is willing to let Him!

Lord, Let me be a light for Your Truth!

Chris' prayer: Salvador's "Shine"

Dust, soil, and broken rock. These comprise regolith, which covers the entire surface of the Moon, creating an imperfect, uneven surface. Not exactly the first materials that I would think of when creating a mirror. But nearly every night, we are able to see the Sun's rays reflected in the Moon's surface, bathing the darkness of our world with a soft glow.

Today's song, today's prayer, calls me to be like that Moon. I am reminded that I do not need to be perfect. I do not need to be unbroken. I am still called to reflect God's Love. I am called to bathe the darkness of my world with radiance of God's Love and compassion, to reflect His very nature in everything that I do.

Lord let me shine, shine like the moon
A reflection of You in all that I do

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Catie's prayer: Salvador's "Shine"

A reflection of You in all that I do

This has more or less been my prayer for a while now. I'm tired of things being about me. I want my life to reflect the love God has for all of us, not so I can say oh look how amazing I am, but because that is what each of us is called to. To imitate the love of Christ to each and every person we encounter every day.

I wanna be used to shine for You

I honestly has no idea what God has planned for my life. All I know is that he wants all of me, and everyone else for that matter, to shine for him, so that people make know about God because of us, because of what we say and do.

Megan's prayer: Cheer Up Charlie's "Fly"

I'm beginning to feel a meltdown...

Seems to be something that has plagued my life - meltdowns. Sometimes for valid reasons, sometimes for not so valid reasons. But they seem to happen regardless.

But what if I were to just step back, look at my life, and realize that...

...faith heals

All I need is a little faith. Faith in myself.

Chris' prayer: Cheer Up Charlie's "Fly"

This is everything I feel, this is everything that seems real

But is it? This is something that I seem to be currently struggling with, or, at the very least, contemplating. Is what I feel actually reality, or are my feelings leading me away from reality? Are my thoughts, my beliefs, real? Are they truth? Are they rooted in something bigger than myself? A friend of mine asked me this question in an email today. His question (below) was made in response to a posting I made on my personal blog.

Is your belief your "opinion" - or is it based on something bigger than yourself - like the Church or God?

It's a good question. It's a very important question. And one that I'm not sure I have the answer to, yet. I have to hope that my questions are leading me closer to truth, closer to what God wants. But I have be weary about being mislead, about buying into a truth that is anything but. Fortunately, as the comments and emails about my posting show, I'm very blessed to have some people there who care about where my questions are leading me.


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Marie's Prayer: Cheer Up Charlie's "Fly"

This is everything I feel, this is everything that seems real

Right now I am extremely sleep deprived. I haven't slept a good sleep in over a week. So everything I feel right now is right on the surface. I have found that this can be both a good and bad thing. If I feel happy, I tell someone, but if someone's not being nice, I get mad. Oh yes, this has only happened once, but I know I should probably calm down. I find myself in some kind of a dream like state at the present and I am only half aware of what I do. And let me tell you, I don't like it. So now I realize I don't want to be this way when it comes to prayer. I need to be aware of God and what he might be trying to say to me at any time. I also know I cannot go by what seems real if I don't know the whole story. I do not appreciate when others do this and that is why I vow to only act when I know for sure what's going on. This probably won't occur for a while though, because I am not aware right now. But I need to wake up, both physically and spiritually.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Cheer Up Charlie's "Fly"

I'm inviting you to Fly

Not only does God want my success, but He is actually inviting me to fly with Him and be successful. There is fine line between wanting someone to do well and actually assisting them into getting to that point. And for one of the first times ever, I am thrilled to have the help! Flying is everything I want to do. I want to fly above my problems and have the freedom that I am so looking forward to for school next year!! No pun intended, this song was uplifting.

Catie's prayer: Cheer Up Charlie's "Fly"

Gods word will never fail

So many times I forget this. So many times I forget that God will never go back on his word, never go back on his promise, never fail to be there for us. Because so many times I feel like...

I'm beginning to feel a melt down, and the walls are caving in now

It's during these times when I feel like my life is a mess that I forget that God isn't going to let me down and that everything is going to be okay in the end.

So why don't try to open your eyes, and take a look around?

I often remember this during adoration, that I need to open my eyes to see God's love revealed to me, because I'm not going to see it if I'm busy drowning in my own self pity. God's love is all around us, all day, everyday whether we see it or not. So why not open our eyes and our hearts to the amazing, unconditional love God has for us?

Marie's Prayer: Jars of Clay's "Truce"

and i stand here wondering.
and i am waiting

This is precisely what I am doing now. I am waiting for the truth to come out and wondering if everything will be okay in the end. One of my friends has made a decision and now all I have to do is wait and see if the other person will be okay. So I stand and wait. I have to tell you that I hate waiting just like Inigo Montoya from the Princess Bride. Waiting makes me anxious and it is never good. Waiting always means that something bad might be about to happen. I just have to give this to God and hope He'll make a choice that is good for not only me, but this other person as well.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Jars of Clay's "Truce"

always almost

this is really how i feel a lot of the time. that i am so close to something...and then it doesn't happen. I feel like so many things are dangled in front of me but never given. in actuality, that isn't so because God has graced me with so many blessings, but for some reason my focus, optimist that i usually am, falls on the things i didn't get. my prayer is for sight, to see the things I have and not the things i don't.

Chris' prayer: Jars of Clay's "Truce"

Faultless in the eyes that I could never open wide enough to see me through.

Sometimes I wonder how distorted my view of self is. I wonder if I'm seeing the same things that others see in me, or just how different their view is. Would I rate myself better or worse of a person than others would? Where would the discrepancy lie? Would it lie in my thoughts? My actions? My attitude? How does God see me? How could I better reflect the image of Him?


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Megan's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Truce"

Sometimes I find myself getting so tangled up in schoolwork, not being able to see the end, that I stress myself out. Suddenly going to school isn’t about the learning anymore, it’s about the grades, and what those grades mean to my future. I get worked up about a two page paper, thinking that if I don’t do this right, I might screw up my chances of getting a good grade in the class. I forget about the pure joy of learning something new, of using my creativity, of expanding my mind into places I’ve never gone.

I’m “unsatisfied with simple things”

I find myself sometimes having trouble with the simple things in my faith. I worry about whether I am praying right, or if I am making a difference in any of the teens in lifeteen, or if I am truly doing what God wants me to do with my life.

An assignment for one of my classes this semester is to read a handful of children’s books each week and reflect on them. I thought it was a silly assignment to begin with, but I have ended up loving it. It allows me to step back into my childhood and remember the days when things seemed simple, when there was no stress about school, but only excitement in learning new things.

Reading these books has helped me find a new joy in simplicity. Learning shouldn’t be about memorization of theories, it should be about the adventure and excitement of discovering something new. My faith shouldn’t be about stressing over whether I’m doing everything right, it should be about the joy I feel when I am praying to God, singing to God, just sitting there and being with God.

I hope that this sense of joy, excitement, and wonder continues.

Catie's prayer: Jars of Clay's "Truce"

waiting around for some kind of peace.
hoping you'll find me in my needs

I feel like I spend much of my life doing this. I spend so much of my life just expecting God to come down and fix my restless heart, solve all my problems. But God doesn't work like that. God is always willing to help us with our problems but we have to be the ones to go to him.

Megan's prayer: Mary Mary's "What a Friend"

What a privilege to carry
Everything to God in prayer

Everything. God doesn't care, God doesn't judge. I can take it all to him. No matter how silly or insignificant it may be, God is there. I am so lucky, so privileged to have that in my life. Although I have amazing family and friends, it's not always easy to carry everything to them, but with God, I have no worries.

Chris' prayer: Mary Mary's "What a Friend"

My favorite professor in college once told me, "You could be giving away gold bricks, but unless people know you're giving them away, you'll be stuck with them." The lesson was on the importance of letting others know what you're offering, in this case, via advertising. I think that same lesson applies to a line in this song.

What a privilege to carry
Everything to God in prayer

According to my dictionary, a privilege is "a special right, advantage, or immunity granted or available only to a particular person or group of people." God has offered no rights, advantages, or immunity that are available only to me. All of His promises, His entire covenant, are offered to every single person. The only privilege is that I know what is being offered. I have been advertised to. I know about the gold bars.

And much like the gold bars, there is immense value in knowing that I can come to God, carrying the weight of my world, and He will take every bit of it away from me.


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Marie's Prayer: Mary Mary's "What a Friend"

True friendship's hard to come by

I totally agree with this statement. I only have a few good friendships, and even those are hard to maintain. Sometimes things come up that are unpredictable and suddenly you know if your friend is a real friend or not. I have to say that my true friends are amazing and listen to me rant as many times as I need to. Sometimes though, I struggle with being a good friend and I have to have a reality check. I ask God today to help me with my friendships and keeping them intact no matter what the circumstance.

Erinnicole's Prayer: Mary Mary's "What a Friend"

Until You I never knew a lifetime guaranteed
Friend could really be my reality

I am very confident in myself and in all of my abilities, with the exception of one or two. One of my insecurities is that I am completely a people-pleaser. I just love seeing people happy and hate to see them upset, especially at me. I know that it is a nice thought but it definitely ends up almost tearing me apart because I am trying so hard to give everyone different things. Along with the territory of people pleaser, comes "friend-pleaser". If my friends aren't happy with me, I'm not happy at all. My other insecurity is reading into things. These two make a truly terrible combination in that reasoning that, I love talking and when my friends aren't talking for whatever reason, I immediately assume I've done something wrong. I've been too clingy, pushed too hard, talked too much, done something, anything to upset them. So I am in a constant battle between my mind, where I am always losing someone, and reality where my friends and I are just fine. I am surrounded by friends, people that care about me, that is. But I somehow always manage to feel lonely when my two closest friends are busy. It really takes a toll on my energy feeling like I have no friends or that I am on the verge of such a thing. More energy convincing myself that I'm not.

When I remember Jesus as a friend, it truly comforts me. Jesus is my Everything - My Redeemer, My Strength, My Courage, My Life. He is so powerful!! So how could He possibly be something as simple as my friend? He has lots of things to do and likes hearing my prayers, no doubt. But how my day was? What boy I like? What dress I want to wear to winter formal? It takes a lot for me to, not realize, but understand how He could care about things like that when I seem to so easily blow Him off. But He does...for whatever the reason, He does. And it's a wonderful thing for me to be able to say, "my best friend is Jesus!...and He always will be."