Megan's prayer: Falling Up's "Divinity"

As I sat in adoration tonight, I couldn't focus. My mind wandered, thinking about 15 million different things all at the same time. Thinking about the homework waiting for me tonight, wondering if I was prepared for the Core team meeting, trying to figure out why I was having such a hard time focusing, etc. It was so frustrating because Holy Hour is my time during the week that I have to slow down, catch my breath, and talk to God, but tonight I wasn't able to find that peace, that time to just rest in the presence of God.

My heart, it hurts
'Cause it never catches its breath

One restless Holy Hour wouldn't seem like a big deal, but I feel like this restlessness has become a pattern in my Holy Hours, and in my life. Even during the times where I stop "doing," my mind still races, focusing on so many other things. I wake up during the night, with my mind making to-do lists for the next day.

I wish I could stop this, just for a while, and regroup. Have a chance to just "be" with Jesus, and not thinking about anything else. My heart needs this time to heal, to gain strength again. I long for this stillness, this peacefulness.