Jesus…Within the past few months, I have realized that my faith, more specifically my view of my personal faith life, is somewhat of a paradox, somewhat contradictory.
… created a paradox in me
I am happy that I am unhappy with my faith life.
On the most recent retreat I attended, I shared this sentiment with the teens in my small group. Instantly after I shared it, I felt I should take it back. I thought I was supposed to be playing the part of the leader; the one who has their faith figured out and was there to help the teens with their struggles, but I realized that sharing something so personal with the teens only helped to bring me closer to them.
I can’t imagine a time in which I was happy with my faith. I constantly look at my prayer life and realize I could be doing more. I want to be in a much deeper pursuit of Jesus. I feel that if I ever come to a point where I am happy with my faith, that it would then just be put to the side, checked off the list of things to accomplish. No sense in trying to fix something that isn’t broken. But I don’t want that to happen to my faith, I don’t ever want to push it aside. I want it constantly to be a top priority in my life, forever at the top of my “to-do” list. This dissatisfaction in my faith life will only lead me closer to where I want to be.
No comments:
Post a Comment