Jen's prayer: Chris Rice's "Clumsy"

I get so clumsy
I get so foolish
I get so stupid
And then I feel so useless

I relate a lot to this song. People who know me well know I'm not the most ... graceful person. They also know that even though I can appear pretty smart since I graduated from college early, I can be pretty stupid sometimes too. And I can be really foolish when it comes to me ignoring God's voice. And it can be during these points where I feel absolutely useless. I don't even know why God would want to use me as a vessel to do his work. Because let's face, I'm pretty hopeless sometimes. Luckily, Chris Rice goes onto say in this song, that the good thing is God still wants me and still wants to be near me. God doesn't give up on me as easily as I sometimes give up on myself. And if God, the maker of heaven and earth, the very guy who could strike us all dead if He so chose, isn't going to give up on ME, then why should I give up on me?

Katie's prayer: Chris Rice's "Clumsy"

From where I stand
Your holiness is up so high I can never reach it

(I realize what I'm about to say is probably not what the singer or songwriter intended for this part of the song, but gosh darn it, it's my prayer and I can make it whatever I want) (:

I have a big problem of measuring my holiness by the holiness of those around me. Sometimes by telling myself it's ok if I didn't do morning prayer today, so and so never does morning prayer. Yeah, this isn't the best thing for me to be doing, but this person whose faith I admire is doing it, so it must be ok, right? Sometimes I glorify those around me, and thus try to be just like them. I know this isn't my favorite way of praying, this isn't a way I normally feel God, but so and so prays like this and says the feel God through this kind of prayer, so I should do it. I should abandon my ways of praying to pray just like this person. I even have thoughts that everyone around me is WAY holier than I am or could ever be. I'm the only one who has trouble with this sin, I'm the only one that experiences dips in faith life, I'm the only one without a deep prayer life.

But that's stupid. Other people should not affect my relationship with God. I shouldn't be looking at the relationships of those around me with God, I should only be focused on my relationship with God. It shouldn't matter if so and so is doing such and such sin, that doesn't give me permission to do it. It shouldn't matter how so and so prays, I should concentrate on my own prayer life, and how I want to pray. I need to keep my eyes focused on God, and everything else will fall into place.

My only hope is to fall on Jesus.

Chris' prayer: Chris Rice's "Clumsy"

And that You wanna be near me

I can be pretty mean sometimes. I can be ornery, and spiteful, and selfish. I can lash out and I am the best at making absolutely nothing ever my fault. I'm good at deflecting blame and I'm very good at being in a bad mood. In short, I can be very good at not being Christian at all.

When I'm able to recognize this mood, I cannot understand why anyone at all would want to be around me. Why would anyone want to put up with my stupidity and selfishness? But whether it is my girlfriend, or a friend or family member, or simply God telling me they want to hang out, I am reminded once again that love really does conquer all things.

Even me.


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Megan's prayer: Chris Rice's "Clumsy"

I get so foolish
I get so stupid

I've definitely felt this way recently. I do something stupid, I make mistakes, I blow things out of proportion. I end up feeling so ashamed, and upset with myself.

But You're sayin' You love me
And You're still gonna hold me
And that You wanna be near me

Despite my screw ups, I'm still loved. God's not giving up on me. He knows that, with his help, I'll figure it out eventually. I'm so lucky.